#say what you mean 10 year anniversary
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Not I want to be happy with you as in I want you to make me happy so I can be with you, but I want to be happy with you as in a want to be happy and I want to be with you and those things are inseparably intertwined to me to the point where I cannot have one without the other.
#it was my anniversary this week#we didn't remember and we never do which is fine because it's not really important#but this time of year always has me thinking about the lessons i've had in loving and being loved by someone else#maybe i'm tone setting for year 10#maybe i'm speaking to my experience of what it means to love someone and be together with them vs loving someone you are apart from#maybe i'm just thinking about how i'd prefer to be loved#whatever the case may be#i do at least think it is a prayer#baruch atah adonai i suppose#lord knows i don't say sh'ma enough and haven't been hospitable to the sabbath bride like i should#but sometimes it's easier to pray as poetry i guess#probably why so many religious texts are Like That
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realised that as all of my irl friends fear me in tabletop games. even after all of this time, i am still successfully following in shizune's footsteps. next comes getting them into risk. australia will be mine
#blue flavoured ramblings#yeah let's go with that tag name for irl shit#i'd tag shizune's source material but it's all in all an awkward scenario. game still holds a special place for me but it seems people who#still hold onto it tend to be a bit... dodgy. it hasn't even aged that badly despite everything being stacked against it!#the worst it has is that kenji no longer reads as an extreme parody of a certain type of person#and is now just an actually accurate portrayal#which if you view this from a modern lens instantly turns him from a funny comic relief#into an actually creepy and dangerous character. unfortunate!#you'd think the meat and potatoes of the game would be what aged the worst given the game's subject matter and origins but#somehow that's aged really damn well. i haven't revisited it in ages but i did read some retrospectives from relevant professionals around#the 10 year anniversary and there was a lot of serious praise thrown. not perfect by any means with a decent amount of pretty important#slipups but WAY ahead of its time.#(shizune is arguably one of those slipups unfortunately)#sucks because it's a big part of what got me into a lot of my current interests (pre-diagnosis) but it's also dodgy as fuck to say#it was your starting point. hopefully the other work i've done would make it clear i'm a Trustworthy Human Being should anybody dig shit up#anyway#weird to think shizune still holds a place of personal importance to me but it makes sense#character who is unquestionably a bad person but is doing their very best to be a good person in spite of it?#character who struggles with communication and simultaneously sees all the hurt they bring while being just as blind to it?#character who wants to lift others up but can only do so indirectly because direct action merely pushes people down?#YUM YUM EATING IT UP#IT'S A TWISTED MIRROR REFLECTION STARING BACK AT ME BUT YUM YUM#at one point i was heavily into the headcanon that she could have a diagnosis like me because so many of her flaws resonated with me in a#deeply personal way. since let go of that because there are meaningful differences and while shizune's story is a familiar one of#being alone in a room full of people it is a much more deaf-specific one that doesn't match with me perfectly and the same goes for their#personality. she still helped lay down the seeds for me to understand myself given i got into it around a year before i got my diagnosis#so i think no matter what i'm stuck with her in my memory now. the least popular character in a super awkward game to like for my interests#awesome!!!!!!#raindrops and puddles#that's the tag name i'm using for this game btw
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for the new year, i have decided to make a couple edits and additions to the almighty Calendar. happy 2024.
IT JUST HAPPENS
DAY 15 GIVE IT UP FOR DAY 15
Thursday the 20th
The Fifth of Wednesday
Second Week of May: Eurovision
Sometime in June: That One Halloween Post Starts Circulating
Sometime in July: Dancing Pumpkin Man Video/Gif
WEEKLY EVENTS (at least the ones i celebrate)
Every Monday: Garfield Hates Mondays
Every Tuesday: Tom Servo Tuesday
Every Wednesday: It Is Wednesday My Dudes
Every Thursday: Out of Touch Thursday
Every Friday: Flat Fuck Friday
Every Saturday: Sea Slug Saturday
Every Sunday: Energy Sword Sunday
YEARLY EVENTS
January 1: Copyright Expiration Day
January 8: Spiders Georg Day
January 16: Appreciate a Dragon Day
January 18: Bug Race
January 29: Threshold Day
All of February: Funguary
ALSO All of February: Femslash February
February 3: WOE, VANILLA EXTRACT BE UPON YE
February 13: Galentines Day
February 14: Aromantic/Asexual Day
March 9: Miku Day
March 10: Mario Day
March 14: Pi Day
March 15: Ides of March
March 23: Ever Given Got Stuck Today
April 1: Mishapocalypse
April 2: Dashcon Announcement Anniversary
April 3: Dannypocalypse
April 8: Rex Manning Day
ALSO April 8: MARGARET THATCHER IS DEAD
April 13: Neil Banging Out The Tunes
ALSO April 13: Homestuck Day
April 20: haha 420 blaze it
April 25: The Perfect Date
April 28: Ed Balls Day
April 30: It's Gonna Be May
All of May: Mermay
May 3: Beginning of Dracula Daily
May 4: May the 4th Be With You
May 5: Revenge of the Fifth
May 25: The Glorious 25th of May
All of June: Pride Month
ALSO All of June: IT'S HALLOWEEN TIME TO GET SPOOKY
June 5: Barricade Day
ALSO June 5: RONALD REAGAN IS DEAD
June 12: Another Homestuck Day
June 16: Let Papyrus Say Fuck
June 22: Summerween
All of July: Disability Pride Month
July 11-13: Dashcon Anniversary
July 20: Moon Landing
September 8: The Queen Is Dead and Sans Undertale Killed Her
September 11: Mole Interest Monday
September 19: Talk Like A Pirate Day
September 21: DO YOU REMEMBER-
All of October: SKELETON WAR
ALSO All of October: People Draw A Lot Month? (so many names)
October 3: Mean Girls Day
ALSO October 3: Fullmetal Alchemist Day
October 13: Treat Yo' Self
October 20: Unnecessary Feelings Day
October 31: HALLOWEEN
November 5: honestly what didn't happen that day
November 19: Goncharov
November 29: HENRY KISSINGER IS DEAD
All of December: Will the Gävle Goat Get Destroyed Again?
December 10: Please, It's Christmas
December 12: Hawaii Part 2
December 23: Christmas Adam
December 24: ALMOST CHRISTMAS MEANS IT WASN'T CHRISTMAS
ALSO December 24: Cabinet Man Day
December 27: Porn Ban Effective Today
#there's definitely more but i'm not versed enough in this#tumblr holidays#add more in the tags/comments please#look i'm trying my best here i've been on tumblr for just over a year at this point#tumblr#tumblr calendar#it's complete. now i may rest.#holidays
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"The Biden administration on Thursday [August 15, 2024] released prices for the first 10 prescription drugs that were subject to landmark negotiations between drugmakers and Medicare, a milestone in a controversial process that aims to make costly medications more affordable for older Americans.
The government estimates that the new negotiated prices for the medications will lead to around $6 billion in net savings for the Medicare program in 2026 alone when they officially go into effect, or 22% net savings overall. That is based on the estimated savings the prices would have produced if they were in effect in 2023, senior administration officials told reporters Wednesday.
The Biden administration also expects the new prices to save Medicare enrollees $1.5 billion in out-of-pocket costs in 2026 alone.
“For so many people, being able to afford these drugs will mean the difference between debilitating illness and living full lives,” Chiquita Brooks-LaSure, administrator for the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services, told reporters. “These negotiated prices. They’re not just about costs. They are about helping to make sure that your father, your grandfather or you can live longer, healthier.”
It comes one day before the second anniversary of President Joe Biden’s signature Inflation Reduction Act, which gave Medicare the power to directly hash out drug prices with manufacturers for the first time in the federal program’s nearly 60-year history.
Here are the negotiated prices for a 30-day supply of the 10 drugs, along with their list prices based on 2023 prescription fills, according to a Biden administration fact sheet Thursday.
What Medicare and beneficiaries pay for a drug is often much less than the list price, which is what a wholesaler, distributor or other direct purchaser paid a manufacturer for a medication before any discounts...
The administration unveiled the first set of medications selected for the price talks in August 2023, kicking off a nearly yearlong negotiation period that ended at the beginning of the month.
The final prices give drugmakers, which fiercely oppose the policy, a glimpse of how much revenue they could expect to lose over the next few years. It also sets a precedent for the additional rounds of Medicare drug price negotiations, which will kick off in 2025 and beyond.
First 10 drugs subject to Medicare price negotiations
Eliquis, made by Bristol Myers Squibb, is used to prevent blood clotting to reduce the risk of stroke.
Jardiance, made by Boehringer Ingelheim and Eli Lilly, is used to lower blood sugar for people with Type 2 diabetes.
Xarelto, made by Johnson & Johnson, is used to prevent blood clotting, to reduce the risk of stroke.
Januvia, made by Merck, is used to lower blood sugar for people with Type 2 diabetes.
Farxiga, made by AstraZeneca, is used to treat Type 2 diabetes, heart failure and chronic kidney disease.
Entresto, made by Novartis, is used to treat certain types of heart failure.
Enbrel, made by Amgen, is used to treat autoimmune diseases such as rheumatoid arthritis.
Imbruvica, made by AbbVie and J&J, is used to treat different types of blood cancers.
Stelara, made by Janssen, is used to treat autoimmune diseases such as Crohn’s disease.
Fiasp and NovoLog, insulins made by Novo Nordisk.
In a statement Thursday, Biden called the new negotiated prices a “historic milestone” made possible because of the Inflation Reduction Act. He specifically touted Vice President Kamala Harris’ tiebreaking vote for the law in the Senate in 2022.
Harris, the Democratic presidential nominee, said in a statement that she was proud to cast that deciding vote, adding there is more work to be done to lower health-care costs for Americans.
“Today’s announcement will be lifechanging for so many of our loved ones across the nation, and we are not stopping here,” Harris said in a statement Thursday, noting that additional prescription drugs will be selected for future rounds of negotiations."
-via CNBC, August 15, 2024
#public health#healthcare#united states#us politics#biden#harris#kamala harris#medicare#medicaid#healthcare accessibility#prescription drugs#big pharma#insulin#good news#hope
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Distraction (Hirai MoMo x Reader) SMUT
Toxic relationship(not with momo), cheating, smut, dom!momo
3 hours. Thats how long you had been sitting on your front porch, waiting for your girlfriend. She said she would pick you up at 7pm for a date, It was your anniversary after all but now it’s 10pm and she’s no where to be found.
You’re lost in thought when your phone rings, it gives you hope that your partner is calling to tell you she’s almost there, that she just got caught up but no, it was just your best friend Momo. You answer with a sigh and a sad, “hi.”
“Y/n? What’s wrong?” She was able to read you like a book, the slight change in your voice told her something was bothering you, “I thought you had your anniversary date tonight.”
“Yeah so did i.” You laugh bitterly, “she never showed up.”
“Again?” Your older friend asked, angry at your girlfriend’s neglect knowing she could treat you better if you gained your senses and left your relationship.
“Yeah. Again.” Your voice is sad now, a bit pathetic, and definitely pitiful. It breaks Momo’s heart to hear.
“Why don’t I come over? We can hang out and I can take your mind off of it.” An added ‘like always’ threatens to leave her lips at the end of her sentence but she stops herself as not to upset you. Usually taking your mind off of it means a movie and crying and ranting but you didn’t know she had a different plan for tonight.
“Please.” Momo’s chest stings at how defeated you sound.
“I’ll be there in 10.”
And she was. One minute earlier than she said actually. Unlike your actual girlfriend who was hours late. It was sad, even your best friend cared enough to be on time. She walked into your house with the keys you had given her years ago, where you’re sitting on the couch, head in your hands, tears threatening to leave your eyes. She sits next to you silently putting an arm around your shoulders, and she can practically feel the tension leave your body as you relax.
“I can’t believe I let this happen again.” You whisper.
“It’s not your fault”
“Then why does she do this? Am I just not good enough?”
“What? No.” The seriousness in the no surprised you, making you look up to her. Her face was just as serious as her words, “if anything she’s not good enough for you, you don’t deserve to be treated like this.”
“Yeah right.” Looking to the ground before the older girl takes your face and makes you look at her.
“I mean it, you deserve someone better” she removes her hands from your face when you’re looking at her.
“Like who? You?” You say, feeling a bit bold after the day you’ve had.
“Yes. Exactly like me.”
You look at each other, your eyes on hers but hers are on your lips.
“Let me help you forget about her.” Her hand finds its way to your hip.
“Momo… I can’t.”
“Why not?” Her lips ghost over your ear, her warm breath sending chills down your spine and letting a wetness spread between your legs.
“I can’t cheat”
“Fuck her. What do you think she’s out doing right now?” She implies that your girlfriend is out fucking other women when she’s supposed to be with you, and she’s probably right.
“Shut up” you say weakly, it’s obvious you don’t mean it. Momo’s lips find their way to your neck, kissing lightly before going back to your ear, you can’t help but sigh at the feeling.
“Look me in my eyes and tell me you don’t want this.”
You look her in her eyes and open your mouth to reject her but the words don’t make it out of your mouth before you’re turning your head to kiss the woman. She smiles in the kiss, tangling her hand in your hair to pull you closer. Her other hand resting on your thigh.
“Let’s get to your bed, yeah?”
You nod in response, letting momo take the lead and grab your hand to drag you to the bedroom.
“Lay down.” Her voice is demanding, giving you chills. You follow her direction as soon as it leaves her lips. Making sure to lay down in a way that shows off your body, which takes an effect on your friend, her pupils blown and chest heaving. She crawls up the bed until she’s hovering you, her arms trapping your head. You can feel her breath fan over your face, and she’s looking at you with so much desire a look that makes you rub your thighs together. Momo’s hand moves to your throat, gripping a bit but not enough to restrict your breathing.
“Do you want me to kiss you?”
Immediately nodding your head it makes her laugh at your eagerness. She obliged and kisses you, even if Momo had a dominating personality in bed the kiss was soft and you could feel love in it. You pull away after a few minutes, saliva still connecting you when you part. The only thing heard now is heavy breathing.
“Sit up.”
You do. Her hands pull your shirt up over your head and then throw it off to the side. You weren’t wearing a bra, planning on a nice anniversary night.
“No bra? Was that for her? It’s a shame, but I’m glad I can appreciate it.” She’s looking unashamedly at your chest, “you’re so beautiful.” She whispers, quiet enough it’s practically to herself, and then leans in to kiss your chest. Leaving a few marks on her way, causing you to make a sound of disapproval.
“What?”
“No marks, she’ll see.”
“Oh baby, I don’t plan on giving you back after I’ve had you so don’t worry about that.”
Her mouth finds your nipple after she finishes her sentence, you moan not only at the action but at the words. The girl on top of you was hungry, for you of all people, a global superstar who could want anyone in the world and here she is marking you as her own.
Momo sits up between your legs, unbuttoning your pants and pulling them off, leaving you in nothing but your underwear which were embarrassingly wet and see through.
“Oh, princess. I’ve barely even touched you.” She quips with a taunting pout as she reaches out to feel you over your panties. You cover your face in embarrassment, your best friend shouldn’t turn you on this much especially when you have a girlfriend, right?
“Don’t cover up, I wanna see your pretty face while I fuck you.” Her hands move from your thighs to your wrists pulling your hands away from your face and above your head, “keep them there.”
She kisses your lips quickly before moving onto your jaw, and down to your neck where she lingers for a while making a bunch of little marks, pulling back to admire her work. You buck your hips up into hers, trying to get some friction her hands pushing your hips down so you didn’t find any relief causing you to whine.
“Be patient darling.”
Sitting up, her hands rubbing up and down your thighs starting at your knees and ending where your underwear ends.
“You’re so pretty like this, underneath me barely able to think.”
The next time her hands reach your underwear she hooks up fingers underneath the sides slowly pulling it down while kissing the parts of your stomach that are now visible to her, she throws the remaining fabric off to the side. You didn’t think her pupils could get any bigger, her breathing any heavier but then she saw just how wet you were and she lost her mind.
“All for me? I bet she doesn’t get you this wet, right?”
You don’t answer the mention of your girlfriend bringing some guilt but she didn’t like that.
“Answer me.” As she taps your clit with her hand, not super hard but enough for your entire body to jolt.
“No she doesn’t.”
She leans in and places a light kiss on your clit, and you involuntarily moan.
“Please.”
“Please what.” She says as she kisses your thighs, of course leaving some marks.
“Ugh, you know what.” You say getting impatient. Causing her to stop touching you completely.
“Answer again, without the attitude.”
“Please fuck me.”
She immediately slides two fingers into you and starts moving them at a quick pace, it’s an easy fit with how turned on you are but you can’t help but groan in surprise (and pleasure). Rough sex is all you’re used to with your girlfriend, fast without a care for you in the world, so when you ask,
“Can you be gentle?” In a weak voice, you expect her to shut you down and make fun of you. But Momo’s eyes soften, still dominating but softer. And her fingers move slower inside as she leans closer to you.
“Is this okay?”
If she wasn’t looking you in your eyes you would’ve thought she was teasing you but there was too much care in her eyes for that. You can only muster enough to nod. Though her pace was slow, her long fingers hit deep inside you and she was moving at just the right angle. You didn’t have to be fucked by her for long to know that she was extremely experienced, effortlessly pulling loud moans from you.
“Fuck.” You’re finally able to speak
“Does that feel good?” Her eyes stare into yours, wanting to see your every reaction. You can only moan in response to her question which makes her stop moving her fingers leaving them buried inside of you as she raises an eyebrow.
“What the fuck?” You whine, eyes opening to look at her with a pout moving your hips up and down to try and ride her fingers instead but she holds you down with her free hand.
“I want you to answer when I ask a question.”
You get wetter at the time of voice which Momo can feel on her fingers still inside of you, she starts moving them again. Faster but still gentle, curling them as she pulls out. She spreads them open in a scissoring motion as she fucks you.
“Feels so good.” Only loud enough for her to barely hear.
“Yeah?” She smirks, “she doesn’t fuck you this good does she, I bet she doesn’t even fuck you at all.”
“Wh- yes she does!” You don’t know why you defend your absent girlfriend, even as your best friend is literally inside you, maybe it’s the guilt but the words leave your mouth involuntarily. Momo stops again, this time removing her hands from you completely. She starts to stand up, a blank expression.
“If you’re going to keep defending her then you can go fuck her.” She goes to get off the bed, but you stop her with a grab of her wrist and bringing her hand back to your pussy.
“She doesn’t get me this wet though.” You finally gain some confidence, “and she’s definitely never made me cum.” The last part is said more so as a challenge to the woman on top of you, you knew she wouldn’t leave if you made it some kind of competition she could win against your girlfriend. Momo’s eyes change, a fire in them now, determination to give you what you deserve.
“Poor baby. Pretty girls like you deserve to cum.” She taunts, her voice is mocking. The hand you’re currently holding by the wrist starts moving and circling your clit at an agonizingly slow pace, almost not moving. Her pace gets faster every couple of minutes, and soon enough she’s rubbing your clit fast enough that you’re seeing stars. She stops just long enough for you to open your eyes, about to complain again but then she stuffs 3 fingers inside of you before a sound even makes it out your mouth, the words replaced by strangled cries so she forgot her bid to be slow now purely on a mission to make you cum as you’d never done with your partner before. She was fucking you so hard that you didn’t even notice when she grabbed your phone with her free hand and took a picture of her fingers inside of you. Throwing it to the side as she leans down to connect her mouth with your center, your moans get even louder if possible. Starting with small, short licks, your new lover groans from your taste. Now that she finally got her mouth on you, she eats you out like her life depends on it all while her fingers are still moving inside you at an almost unbearable speed.
“Fuck mo. Please.”
“Are you close baby?
She didn’t even really have to ask, she could tell. Your chest heaving even more, your abs tightening, the moans getting louder but shakier, thighs shaking and you tightening around her fingers. You don’t answer verbally you just push her head closer to you if possible and trap her head with your thighs.
“I- mo- I’m gonna- fuck.” You can’t even get a sentence out with how good you feel, going dumb from the pleasure she’s giving you. “Oh my god.” You scream.
“It’s okay. Cum for me.” Her words come in between licks to your clit, “Be a good girl and cum in my mouth.”
You’re not sure if it’s her words or the way she sucks on your clit or the way her fingers are so deep inside of you but your orgasm takes over as soon as the words leave her mouth. Curses and Momo’s name leaving your mouth over and over again. Even as you ride out your high, Momo’s mouth never leaves you but her hand that was previously inside of you goes to grab at your chest. Sensitive from your first orgasm, you try pushing her away and closing your thighs but the grip she has on your hip tightens keeping you in place as she devours you. The whole time she’s eating you out she is moaning and whispering to herself about how good you taste. Soon enough you’re shaking from your second orgasm, the sheet underneath you soaked now and Momo’s mouth still doesn’t leave you.
“Ah.. Momo. No more.” You say pushing her head away. She listens this time and comes up to your ear.
“Sorry baby, you just taste so fucking good.” She smirks before she kisses you, and you can taste yourself on her, the lower half of her face is now soaked from you and a mix of her own spit. After pulling away she picks up your phone that she previously discarded, opening your girlfriend messages and typing out something. You look confused and she turns the phone around to show you what she was doing.
A picture of your pussy, 3 fingers stretching you out, dripping onto the mattress below it (the mattress that your girlfriend had bought), your face was visible but barely and a message with it.
Don’t bother coming home. I already took care of her ;)
You go to grab your phone back and erase the message before she can actually send it but she’s too quick when she pulls the phone away and hits the send button.
“You’re breaking up with her. Tomorrow.” She said throwing the phone on the side table. It’s a demand, more so a statement as if you were the one that came up with the idea. But you agree, because now that you had Momo you were addicted and wanted, no needed more. She kisses you, softly and her hands massage your body, she takes care of you. Maybe this wasn’t such a bad anniversary after all.
#twice x reader#twice imagines#twice smut#momo smut#momo x reader#hirai momo x reader#hirai momo imagines#hirai momo smut#hirai momo#momo#twice momo#kpop smut#kpop x reader#kpop imagines
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------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Episode Title: Three Cheers For Warped's Little Darlings! Synopsis: From almost getting shot to fear of karaoke, My Chem comes clean. Cast: Gerard, Franky, Mikey and Jenna. [Photos by L. La Mer] Air Date: Warped Tour/Summer 2004 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Other than being able to sit down for interviews with wonderful people like us, what does being on the Warped Tour mean to you? Frank: Oh wow! Personally, ever since I was in bands at thirteen I tried to do battle of the bands... play Warped Tour and things like that. I never actually won any of the battle of the bands but it's a dream come true to be on Warped. It really is! It's unlike any other tour we've been on and you can't prepare for it in any way. But it's definitely a dream come true to play with some of my favorite bands of all time.
Seeing as though it's Warped's ten year anniversary, give us some insight as to the kind of kid you were when you were ten. Frank: Asshole. I was such an asshole! Uhhh Delinquent. I was told I was too intelligent for my own good but I don't know about that. I didn't like authority and this was at ten! Gerard: Tell me what has changed? Frank: She just said ten, she didn't say now! But I could give you the same answer; you never know! Gerard: I didn't want to say anything. Frank: I was pretty much like I am today but I wish I knew now what I knew then. Does that make sense? Gerard: I liked Star Wars when I was ten.
There's a rumor circulating around that My Chemical Romance is the love child of the Warped tour... Gerard, Mikey and Frank in unison: Whoa! Wow!
Gerard: We are loved. Frank: But what does that mean, that the Warped Tour and another tour got together and had... Gerard: Yeah like Ozzfest and Demolition Derby got together and... but yeah, I feel it. We are extremely accepted and supported and loved so... Frank: But I almost got shot the other night though. [He says this almost nonchalantly as if it's a frequent occurence.]
Shot? As in shot, shot? Frank: Pellet gun shot.
Why would someone want to shoot you? Frank: Oh, I wasn't allowed in a certain VIP barbecue that I wanted in to. Mikey: Chris was like, "just go up and tell them my name and you'll get in" and the guy was like, "who?" Frank: And he was like "I'll shoot you." [Forms a gun with his hand and points it at me.] But as far as a lot of the bands on this tour, they really respect us and it's great because we really respect the bands. They come to watch us all the time and it's been amazing. Gerard: We're very lucky. We feel lucky everyday when some of our favorite bands make time out of their day to come and watch us. And they do that everyday. Frank: The other day, well not yesterday but the day before, we closed and it was really late like 8:10 to 8:40 and we didn't think anybody was going to come to watch us. But it was all of our favorite bands, like the Souls (Bouncing Souls) came out, Anti-Flag came out... It's a beautiful tour! Gerard: It made me proud.
Kinda like what happened today? Frank: Oh yeah! That was amazing!
What happened anyway? Frank: All the power went out; the generator exploded. Gerard: It just went out yeah. Frank: It has never happened to us, ever.
The response was incredible. Frank: We traded a great set for a great experience. Gerard: Exactly!
*Note: Earlier that day in mid-performance, My Chem lost all sound just as they began to play their hit song "I'm Not Okay." Instead of walking off and calling it a day, the band and the crowd began to sing the song accapela. It was quite impressive to watch the dedication and love that their fans have towards them.
Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge is a very strong title. Whose concept was it and is the band afraid of karma? Gerard: Is the band afraid of karma? Uh...wow! Frank: See here's the thing... [Turns to Gerard] Before you say anything... think about what you were going to say because I want to say something about karma. Mikey: I think the album is a product of good karma. I think we've done good things for people and I think that what occurs from the album can only be good. We've never done anything wrong to anybody. Revenge is meant in a different sense, not in the literal sense. You know? Frank: Here's the thing about karma. 'Oh if you don't do this,' something bad is going to happen but who's the one striking down on people? Somebody needs to do that. So if we're the ones to serve the revenge that's fine by me. Maybe we're just the angels of death? Gerard: Now it feels like when we play, we have a purpose. There hasn't been a moment... once in a while you get a little depressed, caught up in something else, but we feel like we have purpose every time we play to do some kind of damage. Not really to ourselves or to the equipment or anything but to what's generally accepted as okay. Like chewing up and spitting up the same bullshit, sounding like everybody else, being homophobic, all these things that are very accepted in punk rock that are amazingly still alive and well. It's fucking shocking... Frank: People never cease to amaze us. Gerard: ...and it doesn't feel like a threat to those bands you know. Really close friends of ours have said that and it's probably the best compliment that I've ever gotten for the band, that we were a threat. Ever since hearing that, I take it to heart everytime we get on stage.
In 'To The End', why does the elevator only go up to ten and would you feel okay getting off on the thirteen floor? Gerard: Well, I felt that picking a lower number would be like 'I can't get high enough' so I had to pick somewhere around ten. I felt like I just needed to get higher; like the top just isn't good enough. I think that's kind of a metaphor in how we feel and how we operate as a band, that the top isn't good enough since that's not what we're after. It's not good enough for us because we want to make a difference and actually change things. We don't just want things thrown at us. But I've gotten off on thirteenth floors. They make them right?
I know someone that lives on the thirteenth floor. Gerard: You do?
I truly do. Frank: It's good luck.
I think so. Frank: I think it's good luck. Gerard: I'm superstitious though.
When you listen to a CD you need something to reference it to. When I listen to MCR, your sound changes from one song to the next and I hear a whole slew of things. Was this done deliberately? Gerard: We can't really write songs that sound alike. We like to capture moods and you can definitely pinpoint those moods. You can say this is the same kind of mood or feel. We like to explore themes and moods but style is something we can't live with ourselves doing over and over. And if that means we run out of material eventually then that's fine because you'll never get something twice from us.
Yeah in like an hour. Frank: I don't know. Gerard: Let's say the whole band died, we'd just get back together and start playing again! [everyone laughs]
You'd find each other. Gerard: Yeah, I think that's what we'd do because this feels like our purpose. You know, it seems like our cause. Frank: We're definitely not done yet! Gerard: Yeah, if we died I feel like we would find each other and just start over.
Do you think writing in the first person makes you more vulnerable? Gerard: Umm... sometimes. I was always worried it was going to make me an egomaniac. I was more worried about that, but then I realized that the way I ended up writing is just more I, I, I, instead of a you and a we. When I say "I" I usually mean the band. I usually mean it in a way that I think that these guys are feeling it at the same time without saying we. [turns to Frank and Mikey] Don't you feel that way? Like when we're on stage and they're singing with me, I feel like they mean it the same way. Frank: It's a more definite thing, more urgent. Gerard: Yeah.
You're in a karaoke bar and you've had too much sake. What song... [Frank turns to Gerard] I know what you're going to say!
...do you sing and do you totally rock it or do you totally kill it? Frank: He rocks the shit out of it! Totally Bon Jovi! Gerard: Bon Jovi... 'Living On A Prayer.' It's funny because a lot of people give me shit when we go to karaoke because I won't do it.
Really? Gerard: Yeah. I'm terrified of karaoke unless I'm wasted! That's the only way I can do karaoke.
You can go on stage and perform for a whole bunch of people... [Gerard shrugs as if to say that he doesn't understand it either] Frank: It's funny because it's rare that we would be out and not wasted. Gerard: Yeah, yeah, that's true. [to Frank] What would you sing? Frank: I have been known to do 'I Got You Babe' with a friend of mine, Greg Southside and we do the shit out it! We've been kicked out of bars because we did it so well. But Ray would like to sing probably 'Only The Good Die Young'. Gerard: By Billy Joel.
In 'You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison' the main character is made to do pushups in drag. If you were forced to so something in drag, what would you choose to do? Gerard: Karate. [everyone breaks out in laughter] Frank: I liked the "if you were forced, what would you choose to do." Gerard: It's like the drag fairy comes by and says "what would you like to do?" Ahhmm yeah, karate. Frank: Really? Gerard: No. Really, I would do what I did when I dressed in drag this one time before. I went to school in drag, in art school and my day was completely different because everybody thought I was a chick. Frank: He looked like Christina Ricci. Gerard: You should see me as a chick. So I went as a girl, as like an experiment and it worked really well and everyone was really nice to me but I couldn't talk obviously... You know train conductors were really cool to me on my commute... Frank: I would date Gerard. Gerard: HA! I looked hot as a chick.
Which of your band mates is most likely to accidentally stick a fork in a toaster... Frank: Mikey.
You are offered something for free. Which do you choose? Sky diving lessons, a custom tattoo, a lap dance from an exotic dancer or 50 free sun tanning sessions? Gerard: Oh the lap dance! Frank: The tattoo. Mikey: What were they again? [Everyone helps little Mikey out] Mikey: I guess the tattoo. Frank: I knew it! Which is funny because you don't have any. Gerard: You would see what you could get and trade it for money.
Seeing as this is an electoral year, which person on the Warped Tour would you choose to run the country and why would they get your vote? Gerard: Fat Mike. Frank: #2 from Anti-Flag. That kid can rally. Gerard: Can they run together? Frank: Sure.
The Velvet Bag of Doom: First up is Frank who pulls fill in the blanks from the bag.
Caution! Do not put _____ anywhere close to me! Frank: Our drummer.
Oh no! I didn't pack _________ Frank: Enough underwear.
If I was ever to miss the bus, I would ________ Frank: Stay home.
Mikey's up next and he pulls word association. First thing that comes to mind.
Video games Mikey: Mario
Birthday Mikey: September
Jack Daniels Mikey: Uh. Coca Cola
Spanking Mikey: I don't know! Gerard: Not even a bare ass? Mikey: No.
Gerard pulls 'name the band associated to the lyric'
"And you will tell all your friends you've got your gun to my head" Gerard: We can do another one because I've sang that one with Taking Back Sunday on stage.
Okay then, round two is a word association again... First thing that comes to mind.
Warped Tour Gerard: Hot
Buses Gerard: Nice
Marijuana Gerard: Stinky
Plastic Surgery Gerard: Awful
Why should the world give a damn about My Chemical Romance? Gerard: Because we give a damn about it. Frank: Save your life. Gerard: Yeah. Good enough for me. And there are so few people that actually do give a damn about the world. Frank: Yeah.
Very true. Gerard: I have a nihilistic attitude so it's like, the new gay...it's popular. You know what I mean? Frank: Popsicle is the new black. Gerard: What did I say? Oh yeah. Screaming is the new gay, everybody's doing it. Frank: I wish it were Popsicle. Gerard: Popsicles? Frank: Popsicles should be the new black and then everyone would have one.
I swear this interview contains 80% of our lore
#frank says he was kicked out of bars because his karaoke was too good#do not put “frank: our drummer” anywhere next to me#omg the karaoke part my heart can't take it anymore#not even a bare ass? gerard#frank does air guns#popsicles are the new black#my chemical romance#troublebunchmusic.com#2004 mcr#frank iero#mcr#gerard way#mikey way#ray toro#2004#revenge era#interviews#old web mcr
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Support Rise of the TMNT: Tips on Buying the TMNT 40th Anniversary Comic
As someone who has been reading comics for over a decade, i understand that the comics world can be a confusing place that isn't kind to new readers. I've seen many people confused about the new TMNT anniversary comic and as such I wanted to make a helpful little guide for those trying to get a copy.
As you may know, besides getting a new 8-page rottmnt story and those sweet future designs, picking up this comic is an actionable way to get more rise content.
Now it may seem easy to pre-order this bad boy. You'll see pre-orders for the book pretty much wherever books are sold online, but these are The Deluxe Editions i.e. Hardcovers i.e. This is the comic equivalent of what is known as a Trade. Now Trades, also known as trade paperbacks, are usually collections of single comic issues that are reprinted into book form. I imagine that in this case it will be the original comic plus bonus content such as spreads of the alternate covers, but I'm getting ahead of myself.
THE PRE-ORDER IS NOT FOR THE COMIC THAT COMES OUT JULY 10, 2024.
The issue that is going to come out on July 10th is the true single issue of the comic i.e. the classic floppy comics you picture from years of olde. Now we can go back and forth on what's more important to the industry (a sale is a sale supposedly), but traditionally, a comic lives or dies by its single issue sales. Comics typically don't get trades if their single issues don't sell well. Now this is already getting a trade so we don't have to worry about that, but Ron seemed to heavily imply here that the sales that are important on this one are the single issue sales. This means:
IF YOU CAN, YOU SHOULD BUY THE JULY 10TH SINGLE ISSUE COMIC IF YOU WANT TO SUPPORT RISE.
Okay, but how do you do that? Comic book stores are intimidating and they don't exist everywhere. It goes without saying that if there's no comic shop in your area or if you are not financially able to then don't feel pressure to get this comic. However, if you can, we know for a fact it will help us get a chance at more content. With that said, here's how you do it:
New comics come out on Wednesdays (July 10th in this case)
Most comic shops have a designated area for that week's new comics
Most comic shops operate on a first-come-first-serve basis unless you have a pull list
Anniversary comics sell fast because they are special and collector's items.
Summarized: Go straight to your local comic book shop the moment they open on Wednesday if you want to secure a copy.
Something else to note: Variant covers of the comic exist. Now, the typical cover is going to be a cover by Laird and Eastman, but there are a bunch of variants as listed here. All letter variants may or may not be sold at your local comic shop. This is up to their discretion to buy. The 1:# variants are based on how many units they buy and will always be more expensive because they are even more limited in quantity.
I hope this helps! Let's support Rise of the TMNT!!
#me#psa#tips#save rottmnt#save rise of the tmnt#save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the tmnt#unpause rottmnt#unpause rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#unpause rise of the tmnt#comic books#Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: 40th Anniversary Comics#TMNT 40th Anniversary Special#TMNT40
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Family bonding
Includes- Toji, Sukuna, Nanami, Gojo, Geto
Sukuna-
Sukuna never brings his child around his followers, finding them unworthy to grace their eyes upon his offspring. Sat in a vacant room, laid out on the floor as he watched his followers trying to entrain him, dancing around, telling stories or jokes. Nothing could suffice him, a pile of heads adorning the corner of the room, yet to become of everyone. Small giggles being heard from the slightly open door, pink hair sticking out from beside it as he looked at it, hands working magic as he sliced their head off, ushering for the next person. Door slashed open just like those people, leaving wooden remains all around. "Show yourself" crimson eyes peering out from the last standing part of the door. A smile glistening on her face, flashing her canines at him. "Papa!" Running towards the king. A smirk on his face as he felt his daughter's embrace, staring at the one servant who raised their head just for it to be cut off, leaving no witnesses to the matter.
"Next!" Motioning for the next person to come in, only to receive the news that there was nobody left, leaving a pile of corpses in the corner of the room, blood seeping towards him.
Gojo-
"Won't mummy be mad?" Sat in his father's arms as he fought a curse, using his infinity to block all the attacks, still flinching from the idea of them getting through. "Not if she doesn't know" grinning at the little boy, he loved to mess with you, hearing you scold him was some of his favourite highlights. "But still" covering his head in his father's shoulder, white hair rubbing against his neck. "If you're that scared we can go home" exorcising the curse as he looked away, making sure not leave a mess and just use the excuse that it ran away. Kicking his leg into his chest on accident. "No!" Smiling at how much his son wanted to spend time with him.
Nanami-
"If your going to stay in here, help me out" trying to declutter his office. Taking down a box full of files, throwing them onto the sofa since he knew that they were no used to him. Reaching for the next one as he noticed a small pair of hands reaching towards him first. "To me" on her toes as she reached for it, wanting to be helpful like she said. "Don't drop it sweetheart." Handing her the box, noticing how she reacted by lowering her body, waddling over to the sofa since the box was too big for her. "Ooo, what's this daddy?" Pulling out a memory box you two made when you reached your 10 year anniversary. Ripping the box open before he could even get a good look at what she was talking about. Ripping the box from her arms, not knowing what she would discover if she opened it up. "Awh" folding her arms over her chest, trying to act cute to get it back. "Let's leave this up here" straining his arms as he put it back up.
Geto-
He's rambling on about his stupid followers, talking about how useless and belittling them, cup in hand as he took a few sips of the drink before he carried down talking. "Here you go daddy" running up to him with a new glass of milk, having it come out of the microwave, it was warm, but still a little cold. Ripping the other cup from his hands, running back to the kitchen to hand it you. "Thank you sweetheart" smiling at the girl as she seated herself next to him, leaning her body onto his.listening to whatever he had to say despite not understanding the meaning behind it at all. "And then they have the nerve to say something about my actions!" Maybe he was drunk with the way he was acting. Small hands leaning over to grab the felt tips, refusing to get out of her comfortable position only for her father to step in and pass them to her, stroking her hair in the process.
Toji-
"Keep up" strolling in the park, he would've kept his normal quick pace but he had his daughter with him, both dressed up in pyjamas as they walked through the park. He was only here because the lines for the food truck were shorter at nighttime. Nightie swaying in the wind despite her coat. "Wait up daddy!" Running up to him to try and grab his hand, only to grab his fingers because she was too short. Picking the girl up as he sped up, wanting to get back before you woke up since he knew you would scold him.
Sat on the bench eating some ice-cream, it was a quick stop by to the shop before they made it to the food truck since she was so hungry. Wiping the ice-cream off her nose with the spare tissue he had. "We've got to go before your ma' wakes up"
#geto fluff#gojo fluff#nanami fluff#sukuna fluff#toji fluff#geto x reader#gojo x reader#sukuna x reader#nanami x reader#toji x reader#geto suguru#gojo satoru#sukuna ryomen#nanami kento#toji fushiguro#jjk drabbles#jjk x reader#jjk#𝙳𝚎𝚟𝚘𝚞𝚝𝚎𝙺𝚞𝚗𝚊
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How do I write mean insults that's in character for a character to say? I'm personally poor at coming up with insults that don't sound generic or would actually cut deep, being mean in general. I want to write a snarky character with a dry sense of humour when it calls for it but don't know how to go about it.
He's also recovering from a superiority and inferiority complex.
As the writer, you know your character best, and what insults would make sense for them to say (also considering the bigger context of the scene). So, I'll just provide you with a compilation of prompts and notes from different sources, and you can choose which ones are most appropriate to incorporate in your story.
Writing Notes: Insults & Dry Humor
A List of "Sophisticated" Insults
Craven - having or showing a complete lack of courage; very cowardly
Fatuous - silly or stupid; complacently or inanely foolish. From Latin infatuate, which once meant "to make foolish," but which now usually means "to inspire with foolish love or admiration."
Insipid - not interesting or exciting; dull or boring
Obstreperous - difficult to control and often noisy
Obtuse - stupid or unintelligent; not able to think clearly or to understand what is obvious or simple
Pusillanimous - weak and afraid of danger. It's been used by such notables as Ralph Waldo Emerson ("It is a pusillanimous desertion of our work to gaze after our neighbours"), and the disgraced Vice-President Spiro Agnew, who called journalists "pusillanimous pussyfooters."
Sanctimonious - pretending to be morally better than other people. It once meant "possessing sanctity; holy, sacred." The genuinely holy aspect faded, and William Shakespeare is credited with first using sanctimonious to mean "hypocritically pious or devout."
Twee - sweet or cute in a way that is silly or sentimental. Just as buddy is believed to be a baby talk alteration of "brother", twee is a baby talk alteration of "sweet". Although twee is still considered a chiefly British term, it's increasingly popular in American English.
Unctuous - revealing or marked by a smug, ingratiating, and false earnestness or spirituality. Unction can mean "anointment" or it can name something used to anoint, such as a soothing or lubricating oil. That idea of oiliness led to unctuous, which can describe the slickness of false sincerity.
Vacuous - having or showing a lack of intelligence or serious thought; lacking meaning, importance, or substance
The insult would also depend on which other character it is directed at. Here is a list of "funny" insults for adults from Reader's Digest:
My days of not taking you seriously have come to a middle.
You are the human equivalent of a participation trophy.
If you were a spice, you’d be flour.
You may have a sparsely attended funeral.
I smell something burning. Are you trying to think again?
You’re like a lighthouse in a desert: bright but not very useful.
Don’t worry—the first 30 years of childhood are always the hardest.
May your life be as pleasant as you are.
You’re as useless as the “ueue” in “queue.”
Your face is just fine. It’s your personality that’s the issue.
...and for your character's significant other:
I like you. People say I have no taste, but I like you.
You continue to meet my expectations.
I’ll never forget the first time we met. But I’ll keep trying.
If genius skips a generation, our kids will be brilliant.
We were happily married for a month. Too bad it’s our 10-year anniversary.
I admire the way you try so hard.
You’re entitled to your incorrect opinion.
Have you tried doing it the way I told you to the first time?
The best part of watching a show with you is when you fall asleep because then I can watch my show.
Don’t call me crazy—you’re the one who married me!
You can always alter these to better suit your character. You can read the full list here, which also includes some insults for kids, best friends, and family.
Tips for Better Humor Writing
Humor writing isn’t all about landing a good joke (except for when it is). In creative writing, the effect is usually a bit more nuanced. Here’s a few writing techniques to get you started:
Subvert expectations. Try to undermine the audience’s expectations or reform them with structural elements.
Save the best for last. Humor is often a release of tension, so the sentence builds that tension, and the pay-off—the punchline—happens most naturally at the end. This is also sometimes referred to as the “rule of three,” where two thoughts act as a build-up to the final humorous closer.
Use contrast. Are your characters in a terrifying situation? Add something light, like a man obsessing about his briefcase instead of the T-Rex looming behind him.
Use good wordplay. Sometimes words themselves are funny, and just as often, their placement in a sentence can make a difference. Some words are just funnier than others, so make a list of those that amuse you the most.
Take advantage of cliché. While clichés are something most writers try to avoid, it’s important to recognize them,so you can use them to your advantage. Humor relies in part on twisting a cliché—transforming or undermining it. You do this by setting up an expectation based on the cliché and then providing a surprise outcome. In humor writing, this process is called reforming.
Use humor as a counterbalance. If you just pile on one terrible thing after another, it starts to become ridiculous, and people won’t buy it. Using humor is a great way to achieve the proper balance between fantasy and real life. Remember, if a roller coaster only did twists and turns the whole time, it wouldn’t be as fun to ride.
Level of Intensity
There are people who shrug off an insult (“That’s just the way she is”) and people who commit murder over an insult (“I’m avenging my honor!”). Plus, of course, everything in between. Which is your character?
To be believable, consider the following:
Personality. How hard does your character take events in general? Does s/he get really excited over good fortune and really depressed over setbacks? Then we’ll find it believable that s/he gets really angry and reacts accordingly.
The second cause of an intense reaction is the nature of the specific fight that you’re creating on the page. Lily Owens lets most of her father’s insults go by (“the art of survival”). But when he starts in about her mother, the topic is too important to Lily to gloss over. Lily’s reaction is intense. She runs away. Another type of character might merely have seethed silently. Still another might have fought T. Ray more intensively, setting fire to the house with him inside.
Finally, the strength of fights is culturally determined. Where public or even private scenes are disapproved of (upper-class London, old-money Boston, “well-behaved” families), arguments may be muted, even when the subject matters a great deal. In other cultures, volatility is not frowned on, and people may feel free to scream at each other in public. In extreme cases, murder may even be considered a duty, as in avenging a sister’s sexual assault.
Where is your story taking place? Are your arguers in tune with local or family culture? Maybe not. You can create interesting effects by portraying the rebels against the local mores: the meek child born into a battling family, the furious feminist in polite 19th-century English society.
On Dry Humor
Dry humor - is all about the subtle irony of the facts being stated plainly; it is the contrast between sentiment and reality that makes the situation funny.
The technique is known for its simple, often matter-of-fact declarations that will make the audience laugh or be perplexed (humor is subjective, after all).
With dry humor, delivery and intention create a sort of comedic cognitive dissonance or contrast. Sometimes it is as simple as using a bit of sarcasm, but it can also be more than that.
Dry humor lives and dies on the back of doing less.
Less facial expressions, less props, less setup—less is often more when it comes to landing the joke. You aren’t using a big, dramatic setup or a grandiose vocabulary to make your point.
Essentially, these jokes are derived from saying the opposite of what is meant or delivering them in a way that purposefully counteracts the supposed meaning of what is being said.
Dry Humor in Writing
The function of dry humor has often been to highlight the absurd.
It is effectively executed in moments where satirization of the circumstances at play require little more than noting the facts aloud.
When writing this sort of humor, quick, cutting accuracy is key to making the jokes land.
Simplicity is king, and an honest statement of the facts will always lead the way to finding the funny.
Sources: 1 2 3 4 5 ⚜ More: References ⚜ Humour ⚜ Laughter & Humour
Hope this helps with your writing!
#writing reference#humor#writing notes#on writing#writeblr#writing advice#writing tips#dark academia#writing prompt#spilled ink#light academia#creative writing#literature#character development#dialogue#writers on tumblr#writing resources
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And the Award Goes To... // A Carmen Berzatto Fanfic
18+!! MDNI!!
A/N: When this year started I definitely did not foresee myself writing not only one but two depraved fanfics both about hooking up in award ceremony bathrooms... but here we are.
This one actually took so long and I don't even really know if I like it but I hope y'all enjoy it. Big cheating vibes so if you're not into that don't read. Ok thanks bye!
Summary: As a writer for Vogue, you've been assigned to cover The James Beard Awards this year. This would be great, as your boyfriend is a nominee, if it weren't for the fact that your toxic ex was also nominated for the same goddamn award...
Warnings: cheating, smut, unprotected piv (wrap it before you tap it guys), choking, dom/sub dynamics, bit of degradation, porn with lots of plot, asshole boyfriend, asshole carmy, no usage of y/n
WC: ~5.8k
Enjoy!!
Nerves. That’s all you’ve been feeling this entire week.
When your boss had told you in October that you were assigned to cover the James Beard Awards you were elated. Partially because, you know, it was the goddamn James Beard Awards, but mostly because it would be your first major story at Vogue. You had been a writer for their Food column for a few months at that point, and while it wasn’t exactly as you had imagined it while writing it over and over in your manifestation journal, it wasn’t bad, and you were sure you could work your way up. This story was a chance for you to do so, so why would you pass it up?
What you didn’t know when you accepted the assignment weeks before the nominations came out, was that your new boyfriend, Alex Moore, would be nominated for Best Chef in the Midwest. This wouldn’t have been a problem- in fact quite the opposite -if it weren’t for the fact that your toxic ex who you hadn’t seen in ages was nominated for The Same. Damn. Award.
Now it’s May, and the dreaded day has arrived. You finish applying your vampy lipstick with a shaky hand as you hear Alex yell for you from downstairs. You two have been together for about 10 months now, and it’s been great. Alex is good; he’s stable. Sure he’s a bit egotistical and barely has any free time, but he’s a chef, aren’t they all that way? Alex talks about the future with you, he always calls when he’s tied up at the restaurant, he tells you he loves you.
He’s nothing like your ex, which is a good thing. You think. You love him. You think.
You rush down the stairs with your red Louboutins click-clacking on each wooden step. The shoes had been a six-month anniversary gift from Alex, who apparently didn’t know that anniversary means year. Your boyfriend came from old money which he loved to throw around, especially when it came to spoiling you. He had also purchased the dress you were wearing that night. It wasn’t something you would pick out, but it was nice. Simple and sexy without showing much skin.
“Finally,” he sighs, seeing you make it to the bottom of the stairs, “You look great in that dress. Shoes are a nice touch.”
“Thanks baby,” you say, approaching him where he stands by the counter, “You look hot,”
You go to give him a kiss but he puts his hand up before your lips can reach him, “Hey! Watch it!” He scolds, “I don’t want red lipstick marks all over me when I accept my award tonight, so you’re gonna have to keep it in your pants, nympho,”
You roll your eyes at the nickname, one that he gave you a few weeks into living together. Alex thinks it’s crazy that you want to have sex once (if not maybe two or three times) a day. He’s nothing like your ex.
—
When you arrive at the awards ceremony, your heart is racing. You had been squeezing Alex’s hand like a lifeline the entire ride there; he chalked it up to you being nervous about the work aspect of tonight.
You weave through people hand-in-hand with your boyfriend, saying hello to those you recognized, being introduced to those you didn’t. Currently, you were becoming acquainted with the sommelier from some new fusion place. Alex knew him from college. Or from when he did his training in Belgium? You aren't sure, you weren’t really listening. The only thing you’re focused on tonight is avoiding a very specific nominee. You hope you don’t seem too distracted in this (very boring) conversation.
“I’m gonna go find our seats,” you say to Alex, excusing yourself from the hellish small-talk, “It was great to meet you,” you say to- actually, you never caught her name.
As you saunter through the rows of tables, scanning each place card for you and your lover’s names, you try to calm yourself down. “No sign of him yet,” you think, “Maybe he won’t even come. That would be just like him, not showing up.”
Finally, you find the place card reading “Alex Moore”, but when you look at the table setting next to it, it’s empty. You glance around the table- maybe it blew off the plate? As you scan the surrounding area, you grow a bit concerned. Did they forget to put your name out? Were you even supposed to be there? You had no trouble getting in at the door, but-
“Looking for this?”
You freeze. Of fucking course he found your seat before you could.
You turn on your stiletto to see no one other than your ex-boyfriend, Carmen Berzatto, Executive Chef of The Bear. He stares back at you with your place card between his two fingers like a cigarette. Fitting.
“Please give that back,” you say, doing your best to seem unfazed by his presence.
“Wow,” he responds in mock-offense, “That’s the hello I get after all this time? C’mon, Jig,”
You wince at the nickname. You and Carmen had met while you were bartending in college. He was a regular at your bar, and you were a bright-eyed bushy-tailed 21-year-old hoping to make it as a food writer in the big city. You two bonded over your love of food, and would trade recommendations back and forth for different spots around town. You were the only bartender out of the whole staff who used a jigger (was no one else worried about their ratios??), so before he knew your name he would just call you Jigger, which then got shortened to Jig. Even after he finally asked for your name (and number), and even throughout your 3-year relationship (if you could even call it that), he still called you Jig more than your actual name.
“Hello Carmen,” you reply with a tight smile, extending your hand, “May I please have my place card for my seat?” You ask again.
As he opens his mouth to respond, you hear Alex calling out for you, “Babe!” He quickly walks over to where you and Carmen stand, “Hey, you found our seats?” He turns to look at Carmen, “Hey man, good to see you!” He embraces the chef, and takes a step back, looking at the place card in his hand, “Why do you have my girlfriend’s name in your hand?”
You panic. “Ummm… Carmen here found it on the ground, and he was kind enough to pick it up and come find me with it,” You (not so kindly) snatch the white paper out from between his fingers, “thank you again,” You hope your tone makes it clear that you want him to walk away.
“Find you…” Alex looks between the two of you, obviously confused, “Sorry, do you two know each other?” Shit.
Carmen looks at you, amused. You didn’t tell your boyfriend about him.
“Yeah!” You say, a little too enthusiastically, “Um yeah! I erm, I interviewed Carmen about The Bear for that article a few months back, remember honey?”
Alex looks back at you and thinks for a second. “Oh right, I remember that article,”
You never wrote an article about The Bear.
“And how could I forget such a face,” Carmen chimes in. You try to give him a warning with your eyes, and he seems to receive it when he says, “Well, it’s good to see you both, I should go find my place card this time. Good luck out there tonight, Alex,” He pats your boyfriend on the bicep.
“Hey, you too, man,” Alex responds, grinning. As Carmen walks away, he leans down to you and whispers not-so-discreetly, “He’ll need it,”
You try to ignore the comment as the two of you sit down. Your boyfriend was a good chef, a great chef even, but Carmen was better. When you read through the nominations all those months ago, you knew he would win tonight. As someone who had watched the man in his element, there was no doubt in your mind: Carmen would take home the award.
As people continue to mingle and find their seats, you take a glance around the room. The reception hall was huge, there had to be at least a thousand people in the building. Which is why it’s so painfully ironic that Carmen’s seat is in direct eye-line with yours. As you continue to survey your surroundings, his icy blue eyes meet yours. He was staring at you with a familiar look in his eye, and you try to ignore the knots it was tying your stomach into. You quickly look away, turning your attention back to Alex. He turns to look at you, and you go to give him a quick peck, forgetting your conversation from earlier. He once again stops you, rearing his head back to avoid your lips (or your lipstick, rather, so he claims).
“Sorry, I forgot,” you say dejectedly to your boyfriend, who looks at you like you just tried to stab him, “I’m gonna run to the bathroom really quickly before they get started,” you tell him, touching his arm.
“Okay, my speech won’t be until later in the ceremony, so no rush babe,” your ever so confident man responds.
You grab your purse as you head out of the large room, searching for the bathroom. You wish you could find an usher…
“Looking for the restroom?” Asks a young man in a suit. You nod. “It’s-“
“I can show her,” you hear from behind you as someone takes your arm, and before you know it, Carmen is leading you down the hall.
You quickly pull back from him, “Would you leave me alone?” You say quietly, hoping no one is watching or hearing this, “I am trying to work and enjoy my night, okay? You should do the same,” you start down the hallway again, alone this time.
“Alright…” Carmen says behind you, “the bathroom isn’t that way, just so you know.”
You stop, and turn to face him again, “So then where the fuck were you taking me?” You ask, exasperated.
“Well, if you would let me show you…” Carmen looks at you expectantly.
You stare back at him silently, and finally allow yourself to actually look at him. He looks good. Like, really good. Carmen never dresses up, but when he does, good lord he’s a sight for sore eyes. You indulge, ogling at the way his black dress shirt sits taught against his strong chest. Even under the thick suit he has on, you can see his strong arms. Those arms that used to hold you, throw you around, flip you over, help you bounce up and down on-
“My eyes are up here, y’know,” Carmen says sarcastically, obviously noticing what you were doing.
You ignore his comment and his noticing, “if I follow you to this mystery place will you leave me alone tonight?”
“Is that really what you want?” Carmen responds with a certain edge to his voice. An edge you recognize. An edge you miss.
You gulp. “Yes,” you say quietly.
“You were always a bad liar,” Carmen mutters, walking past you down the hall, “c’mon, Jig,” he says for the second time tonight.
—
After a few more hallways and a flight of stairs, you and Carmen arrive on the roof of the building. As soon as you’re outside, the blonde pulls out a pack of cigarettes, silently offering you one as his hangs out of his mouth.
“No thanks, I quit,” you say, putting your hand up.
“Well look at you, changed woman,” He jokes as he lights his cigarette, “Old Money Moore wasn’t into it?”
You roll your eyes at the jab at your boyfriend, “For your information, I quit before me and Alex even met,” you look down at your shoes and shiver a bit in the evening air, “why are we up here, Carmen?”
“Will you stop calling me that?”
“Stop calling you your name?”
“Yeah, it’s weird. You never used to call me that,” he takes another drag of his cigarette, “I mean, unless we were fighting,”
“So most of the time, actually,” You respond, humorlessly.
“Did we spend most of our time fighting?” The man looks you up and down as he continues to smoke, “As I recall we spent most of our time fucking,” he exhales.
You bring your fingers to your temples, “Oh my God, get to the point,” you glance down at your phone, “the ceremony’s going to start soon, and I really don’t want to miss anything,” you say. And you mean it - you have a goddamn article to write!
“Is he gay?” Carmen smirks at you.
“W- what? Is who gay? What are you talking about?”
“Your ‘boyfriend’,” he makes air-quotes around the word, “Alex, is he gay?”
You have half a mind to just turn around and head back to the ceremony, but you don’t. You’re not sure why. Yes you are.
“Firstly, he is my boyfriend. No need for the air quotes, asshole,” You start, annoyed that you’re even having this stupid conversation, “secondly, no, he is not gay. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m a woman, and we’re in a relationship, so,”
“Oh I’ve noticed,” Carmen says, raking his eyes up and down your body, “I was just asking because I watched him refuse to kiss you earlier,” he throws his cigarette on the concrete ground, stubbing it out with his foot, “and any man who refuses to kiss a woman who looks like you, well, I just have to assume he probably isn’t into women,”
Your face goes hot. Half from the embarrassment, half from arousal. Boy was he laying it on thick. You clear your throat and meet his eyes, which you had been avoiding doing since the two of you got alone.
“Not that it’s really any of your business,” you start, narrowing your eyes at Carmen, “but he asked me not to kiss him so that I wouldn’t get lipstick on him for when he-“ you cut yourself off, realizing how ridiculous it sounds out loud.
Carmen chuckles, staring into your soul. You avert your eyes.
“When he what, baby?” He asks, coyly.
“Don’t call me that,” you say sternly. Or at least try to.
Carmen starts walking towards you, slowly. He backs you up against the wall behind you until there’s only a few inches of space between the two of you. You still avoid meeting his eyes.
“Jig, look at me,” he says quietly, and you obey, finally locking eyes with him. He moves even closer to you and puts his hand on the wall above you, caging you in, “he doesn’t want your lipstick on him for when he does what?” Your faces are so close he’s almost whispering. God, you wish he would leave you alone. No you don’t.
“For when he wins the award tonight…” you say, barely loud enough for Carmen to hear. But he obviously does, as he hangs his head and laughs. The tops of his curls nearly touch your nose. You stare up at the sky again, half from embarrassment, half from arousal. He was so goddamn close. You could smell him.
He lifts his head, still chuckling a bit, “that dumbass thinks he’s going to win the award tonight?” He asks you in disbelief, “like seriously?”
You knew Carmen would win the award, there was no doubt about it, but he was being a major asshole. A sexy asshole, but it was a bit much.
“Carmy-” You go to tell him it wouldn’t be impossible for Alex to win, but you freeze when the nickname slips out of your mouth. He smiles devilishly at you.
“There it is,” he says with that shit-eating grin on his face, “say it again,” he whispers, getting his mouth dangerously close to yours.
“Stop it,” you whisper back. His nose nudges yours and you turn your head to the side.
“What’s my name baby?” Carmy murmurs as he ghosts his lips up and down your neck, “Say it again, sweet girl,” he pulls the neckline of your dress to the side and bites down.
“Carmy,” You whine. You grip his shirt, trying to find something to ground you as your ex-boyfriend sucks a mark into your collarbone, “please, I can’t,”
“But you want to,” he smirks as he continues kissing your neck, your insides becoming molten lava, “Alex doesn’t need to worry about your lipstick on his face, baby. You know why?” He pulls back and looks you in your eyes, already glazed-over and needy, “because I’m gonna win that goddamn award,” he grips your waist as he pulls you tightly to him and whispers in your ear, “and then I’m gonna fuck his girlfriend while I wear it.”
You try to catch your breath as he releases you and your back hits the wall. Carmen takes his thumb and runs it over your bottom lip. You think he’s going to put it in your mouth, but he just wipes a bit of the lipstick off of it. You watch in lustful amazement as he then takes the red pigment and rubs it on his neck underneath his collar. He pushes off the wall and without a word leaves you standing up on the roof, alone, soaking through your underwear.
—
“Jeez, did you fall in?” Alex says quietly as you shimmy into your seat. You had missed the beginning of the ceremony. “Are you feeling okay? You look a bit flushed,” he rests a hand on your thigh and you give him a small smile.
“Yeah, sorry, you know women’s bathroom lines…” you say through tight lips, hoping he doesn’t ask any more questions.
Your prayers are answered when your boyfriend simply nods and turns back to the presenters. You turn to see Carmy staring holes through you, with that stupid goddamn smirk on his face. You take a deep breath and try to return your attention to the stage.
—
You sit through a handful of awards and speeches, and finally it comes to the “Best Chef” section of the night. Up first: Midwest. AKA: Your Boyfriend vs. Your Ex. Your heart races as you watch the presenter give a speech about the award and the nominees. He reads off all of the names of the nominees, and your palms sweat as you rest a hand on Alex’s shoulder.
The room is quiet as the announcer says, “And the James Beard Award goes to…”
You inhale.
“…Carmen Berzatto of The Bear!”
You exhale.
Alex curses under his breath and clenches his fists. You try to rub his back but for the third time tonight, he pushes you away. You sit quietly with your hands in your lap as Carmen takes the stage. God, why does he look so good even in stage lighting?
Carmen walks up to the microphone after having the medal placed on him by the presenter.
“Wow. Um, I’d like to thank my team first and foremost, I wouldn’t be able to achieve anything without them. I’d erm, I’d like to specifically thank Sydney Adamu, my sous chef and partner. She really should be the one up here, but I guess I’ll take it,” The crowd laughs along with him, “I’m really grateful for this award and anyone who’s ever eaten at The Bear. Thank you.” He looks dead into your eyes and grabs the medal as he ends his speech, “I can’t wait to wear this thing!”
Everyone laughs except for you, whose face goes beet red. Luckily the lights are dim enough for it not to be an issue, but you can hear the blood pumping in your ears. You turn your attention back to Alex, whose ears had apparently had steam coming out of them for the past two minutes.
“I can’t fucking believe this,” he mutters, “that was supposed to be my award. After all the fucking money my parents donated to this foundation? What a joke.”
You pretend you don’t hear your boyfriend whining like a spoiled brat, “Are you okay?” You ask sweetly, “It’s just an award baby, it doesn’t really mean anything,” you try to replace your hand on his shoulder but he swats it away. Hard.
“Jesus can you not touch me for like five fucking seconds?” He says, pretty loudly, considering they’re in the middle of presenting the Best Chef Northeast award. You look up to see if anyone heard and see Carmy coming down the steps of the stage, clenching his jaw as he watches the interaction. You hold your stinging hand and excuse yourself to the restroom before your tears of anger can spill over.
As you stand in the mirror, dabbing your eyes before any more tears can fall, you hear the bathroom door creak open and the deadbolt turn. Behind you in the mirror appears who else but Carmen fucking Berzatto, wearing that stupid fucking James Beard Award. You stare at him through the mirror, silently.
“Well, aren’t you gonna congratulate me?” He says, walking towards you. You turn around to face him, “C’mon, Jig, nothing?”
You stare at Carmen. You watch the way he stares back. All of today’s events race through your head. All the times your boyfriend rejected you, dismissed you, ignored you. Those moments on the roof, the adrenaline you felt, Carmy’s words ringing through your mind.
“and then I’m gonna fuck his girlfriend while I wear it.”
You reach out and grab the medal on his chest and use it to pull him into you. It’s intense off the bat, a mix of teeth tongue and lips, hands frantically grasping at each other. Carmy grips your neck and your waist as you lace your fingers through his curls and give a tug that earns you a soft moan. You begin kissing down his neck, leaving dark red lipstick marks all over. You push his sport coat off his shoulders and begin undoing the buttons at the top of his shirt.
“Eager, are we?” Carmen teases, helping you in removing his shirt.
“Just shut up and fuck me, Bear,” you respond, bringing his mouth back to yours.
“Mmm,” Carmen pulls away, “what happened to my good girl who used to beg so politely?”
“She only gets fucked once every two weeks so she’s kind of impatient right now,” you say as you continue to place kisses all over Carmy’s upper body and palm at his erection.
“Hold the fuck-“ Carmy pushes you off of him and looks at you with shock on his face, “that asshole only fucks you twice a month??”
You look back at him in all of his glory. His curls messy from your hands, his sculpted form covered in your lipstick marks, his pupils blown, his dick, well, huge. Why did you ever give this up?
“He just doesn’t have a high sex drive he says,” you shrug, putting your hands back onto him, “I don’t really wanna talk right now, Carmy,”
“Does he at least eat you out first?” He looks genuinely perplexed and frightened by this information. How could someone have this masterpiece of a woman under their roof and not be ravaging her at least once a day?
“I asked you to fuck me, not make me laugh, Berzatto,” you deadpan back at the man, “seriously, now you know how much I need this, so please,”
“Oh you need it bad, baby,” Carmen says as he turns you around to face the mirror. He begins unzipping your dress ever so slowly, leaving kisses across every inch of your back. You step out of your dress, left only in your matching bra and underwear along with your red Louboutins. “Turn around,” Carmy orders.
You do so. You look at Carmy through your lashes, feeling equally exposed and terrifyingly aroused. The man growls underneath his breath, just staring at you.
“What a fucking idiot,” he says, before picking you up and placing you on the countertop, “doesn’t fucking realize what he has, rich fucking asshole,” Carmy mutters more nasty things about your boyfriend as he pulls your panties down your legs. He smells the soaked fabric before putting them in the pocket of his trousers. He pulls your legs open and groans loudly. “Jesus, baby, is all this for me?” He runs a finger through your soaked folds, collecting some of your arousal which had been building since you first saw him hours ago.
You squirm atop the counter as Carmy just toys with you. He stares at your vagina with amazement, like it’s a piece of art. Finally, he dives in, licking a flat stripe from your entrance to your clit. You gasp loudly. One of your hands flies to grip onto the counter top while the other finds purchase in the golden curls currently perched between your thighs.
It’s just as good as you remember it. That’s the problem, always has been. The sex is so goddamn good. It’s what kept you crawling back every time Carmen would hurt you for 3 long years. You hated your past self for always giving in, but right now, you understood her completely.
Carmy swirled his tongue around your clit as he inserted two thick fingers into your entrance, curling them just right. The stretch was like nothing else. You let out a beautiful noise, causing him to groan into your pussy, the vibrations adding to the delicious stimulation. You clenched around his fingers as he continued his ministrations, feeling that familiar knot tightening in your lower stomach.
“You gonna give me one?” Carmy says, looking up at you with a soaked face and hungry eyes, “You gonna come all over my fingers, baby?”
“Yes, Carmy, yes, oh my god,” you babble, feeling so close, “please don’t stop baby,”
Carmen raises to his feet while continuing to finger you. He pulls you closer to him, leaning into your ear. “Does that feel good, princess?”
As you moan uncontrollably as you muster a “yes feels good,” but you know the questioning won’t end there.
“Yeah baby?” Carmen adds a third finger and you squeal, “how good does it feel?”
“God it feels so good please don’t stop,”
“Who’s making you feel this good, sweet girl?” He continues to whisper into your ear.
“You Carmy, it’s always you,” you respond breathily, the coil in your stomach moments from snapping.
“Say it again,” Carmen growls.
“Carmy oh my god-“ and with that your vision blanks. Your legs shake as you come harder than you have since… well since the last time you fucked Carmy. Your eyes roll into the back of your head as he continues his movements, prolonging your orgasm.
You grip onto his strong shoulders as you come down, resting your forehead against his as he removes his fingers from you.
“Jesus Christ,” you say, as you watch him stick all three fingers into his mouth and suck off your residue. You watch familiarly as he gathers spit in his mouth and grabs your jaw. Knowing the routine, you gladly open your mouth, as he spits in the mixture of the two of you. You moan as you taste yourself mixed with Carmen.
“Swallow,” he demands, holding your throat. And you do. “There’s my good girl,” he says, undoing his belt with one hand, “thought I lost you there, baby,”
You hum contentedly as he continues to hold you by your throat while he pulls his cock out of his pants and boxers. You moan at the sight of the state of it. Veins bulging, tip bright red and leaking, and, well, huge.
Carmen pumps himself a few times before saying, “take your bra off,” letting go of your throat to opt for one of your newly free breasts, “love these fucking tits, god.”
You squeeze your legs together as he strokes himself while playing with your nipples. It’s hot, but you need more. Now.
“Carmy, please,” you said, making your sweetest eyes at him, “I need you so bad,”
“You gonna beg me baby?” He responds with that stupid grin on his face.
“I’ll do anything,” you say, disregarding your pride (and your boyfriend).
“Is that right, angel?” He asks, caressing your face as you nod, lowering his voice, “you’ll do anything for this dick?” He continues stroking it as he looks into your eyes, “you need to get fucked so badly that you’re in here begging me for my cock while your boyfriend’s in the other room. Didn’t realize you were such a slut, baby,”
Your pussy throbs as Carmen continues to taunt you, “yes, I’ll do anything please,” you’re truly so desperate at this point, “please just give me your cock Carmy,”
“Say it,”
“Say what?” You ask, genuinely confused.
“Say you’re my slut,”
You gulp. “I- I’m your slut,”
“And why are you a slut?”
“B-because I’m in here begging for your cock when my boyfriend’s right outside…”
“And why are you begging me for my cock when you have a boyfriend?”
Okay this interrogation was getting old.
“Because it’s so much better, Carmy, please just give me your dick haven’t I been good?”
“You’ve been so good, baby,” Carmy says as he pries open your thighs and buries himself inside of you.
You yelp at the intrusion, not expecting himself to push himself in to the hilt on the first stroke.
Carmen lifts up your right leg and puts it over his shoulder. Then the left. He watches as your tits bounce while you half-lay on the countertop. You watch as his medal bounces on his chest with each thrust. He notices.
“You like that baby?” He asks, snaking a hand down to rub circles on your clit, “you like getting fucked by the best chef in the midwest?”
“Yes Carmy, fuck, just like that,” you moan out, “best dick in the midwest,” you say, somewhat jokingly.
Carmen half-laughs half-growls at the comment, “that’s fucking right, baby, best dick you’ll ever have. That’s why you keep coming back, right? That’s why you’re in here cheating on your stupid fucking boyfriend? Yeah?” With that last comment, he delivers a slap to your clit, causing you to scream and your pussy to clamp down around him.
“Fuck always so tight, princess, always so good for me,” Carmy babbles, getting lost inside of you, “this is my pussy. No one else’s. Say it.”
“It’s- fuck!” You yell as Carmen adjusts his angle, now hitting your G-spot over and over, “It’s your pussy Carmy, fuck! It belongs to you, I belong to you, oh my God don’t stop, please!”
It seems like Carmy misheard you as he stops fucking you and pulls you down off the counter top and kisses you ferociously. He grabs at your ass and you whine at the loss of him inside of you.
“Hold on baby, I’ve got you,” he says against your lips, “just need to do something,” he says, as he lifts off his medal and places it around your neck. You look up at him, confused. “Turn around,” he says, darkly.
You turn around to look at yourself in the mirror. There’s a red mark around your neck from where Carmen was gripping you, your updo from earlier is now mostly down, your chest is littered with small hickies, and between your tits lies a motherfucking James Beard Award.
Carmen pushes on your upper back so that you’re leaning over the counter and re-enters you at a punishing pace. The bathroom is filled with lewd noises of skin slapping skin and moaning. You look up to see Carmen staring at you through the mirror. Except, he’s not looking at your face, he’s staring at your tits. Wait. No. He’s staring at the medal bouncing with your tits.
Carmen looks into your eyes through the mirror, “yeah look at you,” he growls, somehow pushing into you even faster now, “my girl wearing my fucking award. Jesus Christ look at that,” he watches intently as the piece of silver bounces off of your chest with each thrust he delivers, “fuck, who’s the best baby?”
“It’s you, Carmy, you’re the best,” you moan out in response, “you’re the best,”
Carmen reaches around you and grabs the medal, but keeps the ribbon around your neck. He pulls on it just enough that your back arches and your head falls onto his shoulder. The new angle this creates is mind-blowing, and you once again moan all too loudly. Carmen litters kisses and bites along the shell of your ear.
“I’m so close baby,” he strains into your ear, “want you to come with me,”
With that he takes his free hand and resumes his work on your clit. The combination of the dragging of his thick cock over your G-spot over and over again with the tight circles he’s rubbing into you has you barreling towards your second orgasm. Knowing your body the way he does, Carmy can tell, and he tries his best to time his release with yours.
With one final stroke, you’re coming undone on Carmy’s dick, throat still held tight by the ribbon of his award. Carmen stutters as he comes inside of you with a groan, holding your hips in a way that will bruise as he paints your insides, the warmth adding to your intense pleasure. You both come down from your highs with a collection of sighs and moans, and finally, Carmy pulls out of you. You whimper at the loss of contact and the feeling of him leaking out of you.
Wordlessly, you begin to dress yourself again. You don’t even bother asking Carmen for your panties back, that’s an argument you’ve lost to him enough times already. You zip your dress back up, Carmen silently helping you get it to the top as he too works on making himself decent again. You attempt to fix your hair looking in the mirror, getting it back to a somewhat similar state to when you arrived earlier this evening. You smooth out your dress, and go to walk out of the bathroom when Carmen clears his throat.
“You, um,” he looks at the floor before making that piercing eye contact he’s so good at, “you deserve better, you know, than that asshole,”
You stare back at the man you loved for so many years. The man you still love today. He was right, you did deserve better. Better than Alex, but better than him, too. You nod back at him with tears in your eyes.
“Congratulations on your award, Carmen,” you say quietly. You walk out of the bathroom, back to the ceremony.
#carmen berzatto smut#carmen berzatto x reader#carmen berzatto#carmen berzatto x you#carmen berzatto x reader smut#carmen berzatto fluff#carmen berzatto imagine#carmy berzatto#carmy x reader#carmy berzatto x reader#carmy berzatto smut#carmy berzatto imagine#carmy berzatto x reader smut#the bear x reader#the bear fanfic#jeremy allen white#the bear smut#the bear imagine#the bear fanfiction#the bear
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You're Mine (request on Tumblr for a jealousy filled fic featuring Tom Hiddleston)
WARNING: For those that do not like SMUT, I'm sorry, you can skip this one. This is a request I got on Tumblr and I do honor all requests... within reason, LOL.
Today was Hugh and I's third anniversary. The last three years have been amazing to say the least. We met five years ago when I'd stumbled into his coffee shop, Laughing Man Cafe, a coffee and tea shop he owned, located in New York. Hugh had stopped in to sign autographs and meet a few fans, I'd stopped in for a coffee, not realizing Hugh Jackman owned it.
We began dating shortly after, getting married two years later. I'd always been extras in films, but he'd help me kick start my career as being a lead in some smaller films. I was always apprehensive about doing bigger films, so I strayed away from them. Hugh would spend hours going over lines with me to prepare me for various roles over the last few years. I checked my email noticing a script my manager sent over to me. It was a bigger film, of course and I had managed to get the part after a stressful audition. I didn't bother reading the script before auditioning, but I knew it was a rom-com with Tom Hiddleston, who was well known for playing Loki.
"Holy shit." I mumbled, reading over the script. Hugh looked over at me from the opposite end of the couch, wearing his glasses, "What? Did you get dropped?" He asked concerned.
I rolled my eyes, "Why do you automatically assume I was dropped from a film?"
He chuckled, "What's with the 'holy shit' reaction?" He sat his laptop down, scooting beside me to see my phone.
I took a deep breath, "Uh, well... There's a sex scene with Tom and I."
He shrugged, "It's just acting, babe. You'll do fine. Sex scenes are fun to film."
I cocked my brow looking at him, "Really?" I asked sarcastically.
He laughed, shaking his head, "I don't mean it like that. They're awkward. You're wearing these little bags and cover-ups, stimulating sex for hours. It's weird, but the key is to make each other laugh."
He would know. He's the man that's always down for a good sex scene.
I continued skimming the email, "Holy fuck! We're filming it at 5." I said mentally face palming as I jumped up to grab normal clothes, rather than the sweats and over sized t-shirt I was wearing.
Hugh looked at his watch, "Oh fuck, it's 3:45 now. Let's get ready and I'll take you. Tom's a nice dude, you'll be fine, baby." He said as he jumped up to change out of his comfy clothes.
As we got ready and jetted out of the door of our home in NYC, we flew through traffic and made it to the set with 10 minutes to spare. When we arrived on set, I was greeted by my manager, Tom's manager, Tom and a few of the film crew.
"Ooooh, she brought Wolverine with her, Tom. You better be careful." one of the cameramen teased.
Tom chuckled, "I'm always careful." as he made his way to Hugh smiling, "Nice to see you again, Hugh."
Hugh smiled, "Hey Mate, nice to see you."
The director walked over to us, "Okay Jackman, as much as I love your beautiful ass, you're not in my movie. Get off the set." She teased.
Hugh laughed, throwing his hands up, walking towards the side of the set, "You knew it would cost too much to book me." he said jokingly.
Tom and I sat in the middle of the set with the director as she explained the script and how she wanted the intimate scene to take place. "So, we're going to get you two ready for the shot, you'll both be wearing cover-ups, so you won't actually be naked, but you'll appear naked to the audience and to the cameras." We nodded in agreement. "Whenever she comes in, I want you to pin her to the door in a full on make out with second base type thing, but you'll both still be clothed for that scene."
We nodded, "Alright." we said in unison while going our separate ways to get into our character outfits. After about 30 minutes of changing and fixing our hair, we met back on set. A door separating us. This was my first time doing an intimate scene in a movie. I'd had brief kissing scenes over the years, but nothing to this level. I could feel my anxiety building as I took a deep breath, staring towards the door.
"And, action!" The director yelled, slamming a marker.
I grabbed the door, pushing it open to be met with Tom, grabbing me and intensely shoving me against it, pushing his lips onto mine. The kiss was deep, it was messy, there were shots where you see his tongue forcing its way into my mouth. Tom wasn't a bad kisser by any means, I will say that. The director decided the scene wasn't her favorite and wanted to re-do it two more times afterwards, wanting Tom to be more aggressive each time we'd kissed.
I glanced over to Hugh, who was on the sidelines, playing on his phone. I could tell he was getting annoyed, but being the professional he is, not wanting to show it. Tom shook me from my thoughts, "You know, kissing you is pretty fun." He said, winking at me. I chuckled, not wanting to cause issues, but also shaking off the uncomfortable feeling his flirting was giving me. Hugh is typically not a jealous man, but I knew if he overheard the flirting, he'd knock this dude's teeth out and make sure he never did another Marvel movie again.
On the third shot of the kissing scene, I felt Tom's hand brush slightly across my breast. Not enough for me to really react, but enough for me to know he did it. Not knowing if this was truly a coincidence, I shrugged it off as we went to get ready for the sex scene. I was completely naked, besides a small skin colored cover-up that literally only covered my vagina. Tom was wearing a skin colored bag that hid his dick.
We wrapped ourselves in robes while we weren't filming to meet the director as she explained how she wanted the sex scene to go and what her expectations were. This was my first big film, and I knew if I wanted to score a good career, I had to sell it regardless of how I was feeling. As we made our way to the bed and stripped our robes, we both laid on the bed, under the comforter. The director wanted Tom on top of me, so he climbed on top of me and looked me dead in the eyes. I couldn't force myself to look over at Hugh, so I blocked him completely out of my brain and continued looking at the guy that was on top of me.
"And, action!" The director yells, slamming her marker.
Tom looked down at me, "Is this what you want?" He asks seductively, moving his hips in a motion as if he were positioning himself to enter me, throwing the comforter off of us, revealing our naked bodies.
I moaned, biting my lip, "I want you."
Tom stimulated his hips as if he'd slammed into me while I stimulated the scene to make it look as if I were matching his thrusts as both of us moaned. He took one of my nipples in his mouth and began sucking on it while still pretending to thrust into me while I drug my fingernails down his back and cried out his character's name.
The scene in the movie only showed the sex for about two minutes, before cutting to a scene of both of us cuddled in bed talking about how we couldn't let our spouses find out about what we'd done.
Tom giggled, "We can't let them know. This needs to be our dirty little secret."
I smirked, "I know, I know... But you fuck so much better than anyone I've ever been with. He'll be out of town working all week anyways."
Tom leaned down, kissing my head, holding me, "Do you know how long I've waited to do that? How hard it is being around you two and having to hide how hard my dick gets when you're around me... We're horrible people." He chuckled.
I rolled my eyes, "What they don't know won't hurt them." I said as I playfully trailed my fingers down his stomach, "I want more..." I said seductively.
"Cut! That was perfect, guys!" The director exclaimed, running towards us with our robes.
Filming for the day had ended and I hadn't looked at Hugh in hours. I was too afraid to. I know this is what actors do and he knows good and well how acting in films can be, but something in me felt like this was going to be a disaster. As I put my normal clothes back on and told everyone bye, I noticed Hugh was outside on his phone. He looked pissed.
I walked up behind him, wrapped my arms around him, "I'm finished, baby. Do you want to get dinner?" I asked sweetly.
He glanced at me, ending the phone and walking to get in the car, "Not hungry." He grunted.
I opened the door of the car, awkwardly getting in, "We're going home." He said coldly.
"Are you okay?" I asked, reaching for his arm, only to have him pull away.
He kept his eyes focused on the road, "What's wrong, love? You won't even look at me." I said, starting to tear up.
He scoffed, "What's wrong? You enjoyed that! You were really getting into that wannabe Wolverine motherfucker all over you!" He spat.
My jaw dropped, "Excuse me? What are you talking about? I was doing my job, Hugh!"
He laughed annoyingly, "Really? Your job wasn't to look like you were shooting a motherfucking pornography movie. It was to do a two minute sex scene and you took it too fucking far with him. Do you want to fuck him that bad?"
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Was he really that jealous by me doing a sex scene in a movie he told me to audition for?
I shook my head, "What are you talking about right now? I did exactly what the director asked me to do." I said in defense.
He looked at me, "Really? Do you realize how fucking heartbreaking it is to watch a younger man, closer to your age all over you, sucking on your tits? Then you're both talking about good thing our spouses don't know. You know you were turned on by it. I know you."
I rolled my eyes, "Whatever, Hugh. Just get me home before I start walking. I'm seriously about to get out of this car."
He scoffed again, "Yeah? Go ring Tom, I'm sure he'll pick you up."
As we got home, he hopped out of the car, making sure he slammed the door and every door inside the house. He was being dramatic. Does seeing me stimulating a fake sex scene with an attractive actor that's younger than him bother him that badly? I'm literally doing what he does with other women, well maybe not that extreme, but does he forget that I have to see him kissing or flirting with other women onscreen in almost every movie or interview he does? I mean shit...Excuse me for just furthering my career.
As the night went on, he seemed to calm down. I found him playing his piano, looking lost in his own thoughts. I walked towards him, "Are you finally calm?" I asked bluntly, bracing myself for the reaction.
He shook his head cheekily, "I'm fine. Do you want to have a cuddle in bed?" He asked, smiling at me.
I nodded, "Of course, love." I said, while grabbing his hand, leading him to our bedroom.
As we approached the bed, he pushed me down, kissing me aggressively, biting and sucking on my bottom lip as if he were going to literally gnaw it off. "You really think he's better than me, huh?" He mumbled against my lips, causing me to roll my eyes.
I brushed the comment off and continued the kiss, "Answer me." He growled while pushing his boner into my hips. "No..." I said lowly. "No, what?" He spat back, pushing himself further into my hips. "No baby, I don't." I said, looking up at him.
"I sat on the side and watched him practically fuck you and touch you for hours. Do you know how fucking bad I wanted to rip his face off for touching my wife?" He asked as yanked my shirt off. "Watching him suck on your perfect tits... You're mine, do you understand that?" He said while pulling my pants off, leaving me in my bra and underwear.
I nodded, "Yours..." He sat back up pulling his own clothes off as he climbed back on top of me, pulling my panties to the side, shoving his fingers inside me, while sucking on my neck. "This is my pussy." He whispered into my ear as his fingers danced inside me.
I couldn't help the moan that escaped from my lips, "Oh fuck... Baby, don't stop." I moaned, while reaching for his boxers. "I want you."
He pulled them down, revealing his hard cock, "You want me? Are you sure you don't want Tom?" He asked, cocking his brow at me as he rubbed my clit.
I nodded, biting my lip so hard I could taste blood, "You're the only one I want..." I said as I reached for his cock, wrapping my hand around the length.
"Show me." He said, pulling me on top of him. I slid down his frame, kissing every inch of his torso as I made my way down to his manhood. I felt him place his hand on the back of my head as I took him into my mouth. I sucked hard on the tip while letting my hand work the base as I felt him start roughly thrusting into my mouth as he threw his head back, his moans filling the air.
"That's a good girl. Show me how much you want my dick." He moaned, as I began bobbing my head quicker taking his rough thrusts deep into the back of my throat.
This was not like Hugh, but I was loving every minute of it. It almost makes me wish I'd taken more opportunities to push his buttons. I could feel him throbbing in my mouth as he pulled out not wanting to cum just yet. He glanced down at me, motioning for me to get on my knees.
I did as I was told as I felt him push my panties to the side, entering me. His thrusts were fast and rough, not the sweet, romantic I was used to getting. He slapped my ass hard, "Is this what you wanted?" He grunted, "You wanted this cock, you don't want anyone else's cock, do you?" He gave a deeper thrust, "Answer me or I'll stop and you can go ring Tom instead." He yelled.
I threw my head back, trying to form words as the feeling of euphoria overtook my body. "Fuck! Don't stop!" I managed to scream between moans, "I only want you." I said, trying to not let myself go this soon.
He grabbed a handful of my hair, turning my face to look at him, "This is mine. All mine." He moaned. I could tell he was getting close, I could feel him throbbing inside me. "Cum for me, baby. Let me see how good I make you feel." He said while tugging on my hair.
I let go and exploded on him, literally falling down to the bed as I felt him cum deep inside me. He collapsed beside me, breathless. "Do you feel better now?" I asked him chuckling, sounding a bit amused while trying to catch my breath.
He chuckled, "I do. Are you okay? I didn't hurt you, did I?" He asked sweetly.
There he was... There was my sweet baby. I smiled, "You didn't hurt me in a bad way, if that's what you're asking. Maybe I should make you jealous more often." I joked.
He laughed, pulling me closer to him, "Maybe so, love."
#fantasy#hugh jackman#hugh jackman x reader#marvel#fan fiction#fandom#fem reader#oc art#wolverine#fanfic#smut#logan howlett#james howlett#fanfics#mcu#oc rp#wattpad#authors#creative writing#writers on tumblr#writing#imagination#one shot
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babe [ lando norris ]
[ 𝗣𝗔𝗜𝗥𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗦 ] — lando norris x reader . ⊹ ✶ ㄔ 🫂 °. *
[ 𝗗𝗘𝗧𝗔𝗜𝗟𝗦 & 𝗪𝗔𝗥𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗚𝗦 ] — angst, some hate comments . ⊹ ✶ ㄔ ℹ️ °. *
࣪˖ 💭 .. 𝗘𝗬𝗔’𝗦 𝗡𝗢𝗧𝗘𝗦 ⌕ another one from the drafts! enjoy <3
this work is purely fictional. names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. © httpsuniverse, 2023. do not steal, repost in other platforms, translate and/or claim this work as your own.
f1wags
16,920 likes
f1wags y/n’s ig story update today! it seems as though lando norris is officially off the market as the 2020 season comes to an end, congratulations to the happy couple! 🥳❤️
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user what omg
user from childhood bestie to fiancée 🥹 dang when’s it my turn!!!
user i just woke up wtf !!! congratulations mum and dad landonorris yourusername
december 15, 2020
yourusername
liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, charles_leclerc and others
yourusername how can i ever say no to that face 😟 you’re making our childhood dream come true 💘
view all 599 comments
user lando lmao 👉🏻🫦👈🏻
f1 congratulations, y/n and lando!
mclaren congratulations 🫡💒
yourbffsig omg bestie!! 😻 congrats, i love you both!!
yourusername you’re coming back home for our wedding 😤 i’m not taking no for an answer
yourbffsig as if i’m gonna say no!! 😤
december 16, 2020
landonorris
liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, alex_albon and others
landonorris promoted from boyfriend to fiancé! you can never get rid of me now, y/n y/l/n 😜 i love you!
view all 2,842 comments
maxfewtrell remember when you told me you were determined to make her a norris?
yourusername ugh hes so obsessed w me 🙄
maxfewtrell yeah it’s annoying 🤢
landonorris i hate you both, give me back the ring yourusername i unpropose to you
yourusername 😽😽
december 16, 2020
landonorris and yourusername
liked by danielricciardo, carlossainz55, yourbffsig and 1,392,942 others
landonorris two years ago, we exchanged our vows on valentine’s 💗 happy valentine’s and 2nd anniversary, my hot, beautiful wife. to more adventures and years to us 🥂 i love you.
view all 21,839 comments
yourusername happy anniversary to us, my love!!
landonorris i’m still obsessed with you
yourusername when are you not baby 🤭
yourbffsig ugh u two disgust me but stay in love ig
user i still can’t believe lando is really off the market for two years now 😔
yourmomsig stay in love, you two!! 🤍
user will we be expecting baby norris this year? if no, why not 😭
yourusername no plans for baby norris yet! me and lando are children ourselves 😂
— ❤️ by landonorris
user dinks, my fav dinks.
user can u adopt me instead
february 14, 2023
f1wags
10,729 likes
f1wags we haven’t had a glimpse of y/n in the paddock the past few races, so here’s some throwback pictures with husband, lando norris! 🤍
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user i miss her :(
user so i’m not going CRAZY for noticing that she hasn’t been to any races this season...
user maybe she’s pregnant or something
user nahh impossible, y/n herself said that they don’t have any plans for baby norris yet.
user right.. that could only be the plausible reason why she’s not attending races 🙄
user maybe she’s just busy with work, she has a career herself
user no bc think about it.. it’s already round 10 and we haven’t seen her since bahrain, not even during testing 💀
user well, silverstone’s up next. let’s just hope she’s there for lando’s home race
user we can just hope
july 02, 2023
f1gossip
5,930 likes
f1gossip y/n’s now deleted ig story today. wonder what’s happening between the young couple? 🤔
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user NO WHAT
user I JUST WOEK UP WHAT IS THIS DRAMA
user MAYBE ITS JUST NOTHING PLS MAYBE SHES JIST LISTENING TO MUSIC I MEAN IT’S TAYLOR !!!! WJO DOESN’T LISTEN TO TAYLOR
user ...me... i don’t listen to taylor 😬
user what rhe heck u have to listen NOW
user miss maam r u ok yourusername
user not on silverstone weekend 😭
july 07, 2023
yourusername
el nido, palawan
liked by yourbffsig, yourmomsig and others
yourusername let the sea set you free
view all 749 comments
user miss maam we miss u around the paddock PLS COME BACK
user omg she got a tattoo 🥹 it looks so pretty
yourbffsig i hope you enjoyed your stay with me 🥺
yourusername duh, ofc!! was the most fun month of my life 💗 see you in bali ;)
yourbffsig OMG YES see you in a week, enjoy your remaining days in el nido 😽 love you and take care!!
yourmomsig my beautiful daughter, i love you whatever happens 🤍 glas you’re enjoying philippines x
yourusername aaaa love and miss you mum 🥹 be back soon <3
yoursistersig what about me 😒
yourusername stfu you’re literally coming to bali with me
yoursistersig oh yea lol
user the comments from y/n’s friends and family are scaring me (kinda)
user have u noticed that lando hasn’t commented anything or even leave a like ... i miss his obsessed hubby comments
user plus her last ig story 😓
user oh god pls dont do this to me
user are yall thinking what im thinking...?
user whatever you’re thinking, pls keep it to yourself PLS I CANNOT DO THIS.
user so... you’re m.i.a in silverstone?
july 08, 2023
landonorris
liked by f1, oscarpiastri, mclaren, lewishamilton and 1,613,093 others
landonorris p2 and a 🏆 at my home race!!!!! ❤️ you guys are crazyyyyyyyyyy 💙
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mclaren proud 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧
masonmount congrats brother!
maxfewtrell absolute scenes, proud brother 🧡
user no signs of y/n here ... 🤔
user ikr like where tf is she
user haven’t seen her since the beginning of this silly season
user she’s out there weeping while her husband’s winning 😹
yourusername
bali, indonesia
liked by yourbffsig, yourmomsig, f1wags and 153,920 others
yourusername crazy how time flies when you’re being yourself; careless and free 🍃
view all 490 comments
yourbffsig love the glow these days! miss you terribly 💔
yourusername don’t be dramatic, you’ll be here in a few days 😛
yourbffsig 🙄 let me be dramatic pls
user uh excuse me maam, you have some races to attend to?
user she’s not really obligated to attend lol let her live her life.
user uh she has a husband who she needs to support? duh? besides, whose money do you think she’s spending?
user y/n earns her own money, she has her own business even before she and lando tied the knot. she has a degree for that, icydk.
user all this time i thought she was a sahw lmfao
user the username of her business is literally on her bio, in case you haven’t seen it :)
yoursistersig love how you look in the first picture 😂 wearing shades because you cried all night?
yourusername i was drunk, in my defense.
yoursistersig yeah, you’re one drunk crier 😂
yourusername quit exposing me please 🥲
user no “congrats lando!”? no “p2 baby!!”? none? ok
user no cuz i rly thought she’d at least say congrats 😐
user imagine securing a podium on ur home race and ur wife cant congratulate u lmao sad life for lando norris
user i hope you’re ignoring the hate comments and healing, y/n ❤️ your peace of mind comes first over everything
user she knew what she was getting into when she married lando, she should be tough enough to read the comments 😂
f1wags
12,420 likes
f1wags updates on lando & y/n! seems like their fairytale love story is over which is why we haven’t seen y/n lately every race weekend!
view all 3,826 comments
user um what
user not them 💔
user omg i feel bad for y/n
user everything probably took a toll on her mental health
user i hope she’s healing and resting, also i hope she’s not pressuring herself on healing :(
user from strangers to childhood besties to lovers to strangers again :/
user damn this hit hard
user dont do this to me please.
user i knew the caption on her last post meant something 😭
#lando norris imagine#lando norris angst#lando norris one shot#lando norris instagram edit#lando norris insta au#f1 imagine#f1 fan fic#f1 one shot#f1 instagram au#f1 instagram edit#f1 x you#f1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#formula one imagine#formula one x reader#formula 1 x reader
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hurt people, hurt people.
back to masterlist
synopsis ᯓ You thought you and Heeseung would last forever, well it seemed so as your 3 year relationship was smooth sailing. But that all changed one night when he abruptly ended things between you two. Now it's been a year and you could successfully say you've healed from the breakup, but when you get a call from him the night before he leaves for uni, that statement might not be so set in stone.
now playing > •၊၊||၊|။||||| 0:10 the grudge - olivia rodrigo
warnings ˎˊ˗ cursing, crying, fighting, toxic relationship, heavy heavy HEAVY angst, err no comfort soz i feel evil
genre ⭑.ᐟ angst
pairings: non-idol ex!heeseung x female reader
wc ᵎᵎ 1.21k
thoughts frm yuya 💭 this is me projecting lolz sorry
Oh for fucks sake.
You let out a frustrated sigh seeing the caller ID that popped up on your phone. It had been 1 year since you and Heeseung had broken up and quite honestly you were doing great. You had finally healed from ending your 3 year long relationship, you were loving your life, meeting new people, you felt better. But that all came crumbling down when you saw that dreadful notification pop up on your screen.
In all honesty you really should’ve blocked his number, you had done so on every other social media platform, but for some reason you couldn’t really bring yourself to block his number. Whenever you try something simmered in the guts of your stomach stopping you. It was the same sensation you felt whenever you tried to throw away the last letter he had given you for your 3 year anniversary. You had tossed all the other letters, gifts, and sentiments out the second you ended things with him; but you could never bring yourself to throw out that last letter. Perhaps because that would mean Lee Heeseung would truly, permanently, and irrevocably be out of your life for good. But that’s what you wanted…wasn’t it?
Don’t pick up, a small voice in your head whispered. “Hello?”
“I thought you blocked my number” he replied, you could hear him laughing from his nose. Fuck you hated it, you hated it but you wanted to ingrave his laugh into your ribcage. Maybe then you wouldn’t feel so absolutely hollow whenever you forced out a laugh on multiple cafe dates with numerous other men.
“Well, I obviously didn’t” your voice was still shaky as you let out quivering exhales. Great YN, not even a full 5 minutes into the conversation and you already want to cry. “Why are you calling?” you manage to force out, tone still hesitant.
“Um-” he started “It’s my last day today, I’m flying out to uni soon…”
You didn’t realise his departure had already arrived. “I know.”
“I just uh-” you could hear from the other end of the line how he cleared his throat, before continuing with a voice mirroring the apprehensiveness of your own “I wanted to apologise, one last time before I leave”
“Oh…” you mumbled out
“I’m sorry for ending things like that” the moment he said that it all flashed back to you. That night you tried to lock away in the back of your mind suddenly unleashed itself from its cage. To describe your breakup in one word it would be: abrupt.
“We should end things” Heeseung uttered, leaving you standing there notebooks in hand, mouth agape, and heart absolutely shattered.
“What are you talking about” you managed to reply with, words choked out and shaking.
“I leave for university next year, I just-” he paused to look down before continuing “I don’t think we could ever be long distance, it’s too much for you and me. You’d still be in highschool and I’d be busy adjusting in uni, it just- I don’t think it’ll work. You were never even really attentive to me when we’re just a few mere minutes away from each other, how could we ever do that long distance?”
Coward couldn’t even look you in the eyes before breaking your heart.
“I was, really just an ass-” heeseung continued, snapping you back to the present “you didn’t deserve that and we both know it. I was just- really scared I think, of course that’s not an excuse…but yeah I’m sorry”
“It’s okay…” it wasn’t
A beat passes.
Now two.
You remain in an awkward limbo of deciding between ending the call or continuing the conversation. All the words you had pent up for the past year were on the tip of your tongue just itching to be said, but some part of you just wouldn’t let them.
“Do you-” he finally says between sniffles, oh great so he’s crying now “did you ever see a future with us?”
Of course you did, hell you didn’t even expect him to end things and he has the audacity to ask this? What was his issue? “Kinda I guess” you mutter out, barely eligible
“I did” A lie. That’s nothing but a lie. How could he even see a future with you when he walked out so easily? “I saw a future with us YN, I saw it and- I got scared to be honest. It was a future but it was built upon uncertainty, and I wasn’t ready for that. I shouldn’t have done that though.”
“Heeseung it’s fi-”
“Did you ever think about breaking no contact?” he interrupts “I did.”
“Heeseung.” his name is bitter as it leaves your tongue “Stop it. You’re being selfish.”
“Wh-what how am I being selfish” absolutely unbelievable.
“You’re saying this the night before you leave to uni, the night before you change your phone number, the night before you fly off to a completely new country not giving me any chance to ever see you again. That’s selfish. You were selfish when you broke up with me and you’re being selfish now.” you’re fully crying at this point
“YN I-” but you don’t let him finish that sentence
“You know you really aren’t allowed to make my life a living hell for 6 months and then waltz back in like you did no damage-” you choke out between sobs, you’re not even sad now, it’s just pure unrivalled rage and disbelief “You’re not allowed to do that, it’s not fair. None of this was ever fair. How come you can tell me over and over again how I’m never doing enough and beg for me to be more attentive to you then leave and cut me off so easily?”
The other end of the line remains silent.
“You’re not allowed to be the one to walk out, I wanted to be the one to do that. I was meant to be the one to cut things off, to leave, to walk out. I wanted to be the one to finish things, how could you do that?” you’re clutching onto your heart with a pain you could only remember experiencing once in your life: the night he walked out.
“YN I’m sorry I really am, I don’t know why I even called you tonight,” he stuttered out before pausing to curse under his breath “I just, I couldn’t just leave without apologising.”
“So what, you wanted to hurt me one more time before leaving?” you spat back, words plagued with anger and remorse
“I wanted to say that I loved you for fucks sake!” oh.
You loved Heeseung too, you knew that the moment you laid eyes on him across the basketball court when he shot that three pointer. You knew the moment he flashed that toothy grin. You knew the moment he traced his fingers across your waist as you laid together in the quiet of the night. And you still knew you loved him when he spat out those words that changed your life forever.
“Bye Heeseung, I really can’t fucking do this right now”
“I love you YN, I don’t think I ever stopped.”
You don’t return that sentiment before ending the call
perm taglist (send an ask to be added!) @floweryang @cupidhoons @msauthor @dimplewonie @cholexc @i2ycat @bunnbam @tobiosbbyghorl @jlheon
#yuya writes! ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪#enhypen au#k-labels#enhypen scenarios#enha#enhypen#enha x reader#enha imagines#enhypen heeseung#enhypen x reader#enhypen imagines#enhypen drabbles#enhypen angst#enha scenarios#enha angst#lee heeseung x reader#heeseung#lee heeseung#heeseung imagines#heeseung x reader#heeseung angst#heeseung au#heeseung x y/n#enhypen x female reader#heeseung fic#heeseung fanfic#lee heeseung enhypen#heeseung enhypen#enhypen fanfic#enhypen fics
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Where do the years go? The first is the hobby of a bored teenager replaying childhood games while seeking comfort. The second is spent finding new friends who share the same interests. The third wants to grow, but from a clean slate. The fourth wonders if the risk was worth it. The fifth struggles with life choices, seeking comfort from what is now a long-term project. The sixth is spent mourning the loss of a parent. The seventh begins to pick up the pieces, and the eighth begins to flourish. The ninth marks the beginning of a new stability and the tenth... I realize I'm no longer young enough to pretzel my body in my chair without consequences.
There's not much new to say about what On Borrowed Time means to me that I didn't already say in the 9th anniversary piece, but I continue to be grateful about what this silly little fanfiction has brought to me over the years. To readers old and new, I'm excited to continue this journey with you! Let's just hope it doesn't take another 10 years, haha
(Are you a newer reader to OBT and want context for who's in the reflection in the wet sand? The current iteration of OBT is actually a reboot of this comic!)
#on borrowed time comic#ask-obt#ooc#art#anniversary#good lird that's a lot of years#rune#malachi#inigo#dielle#kodali#fawkes#fienne
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౨ৎ. not the same. — c.yj
synopsis - waking up a week after you and yeonjun’s breakup, only to remember it was supposed to be your anniversary today.
warnings - angst with no happy ending ;(, yeonjun cheated, gn!reader, mentions of alcohol and being drunk, cursing, not proofread | wc : ??
notes - do not read if u get sad easily…
head pounding headache, heavy heart and chest, blurry eyes and a dried face was all you could feel right now. ever since you and yeonjun broke up only a week ago, your routine has been much different.
no motivation to go out, the feeling of your phone vibrating with notifications from your friends trying to get you to go out, occasionally some from yeonjun still attempting to apologize for his actions.
LAST WEEK
it was your bestfriend, yuna’s birthday party. she was a huge party person, so it was basically a whole frat/house party just celebrating her birthday. a dj blasting music, self serve bar with lots of alcohol, and food.
you came with yeonjun, but were soon separated after he told you he would just get another drink and maybe say hi to some friends who he passed by while walking with you. you trusted yeonjun with your whole heart, of course, how couldn’t you after dating for almost 2 years?
the minute yeonjun left you alone with your friends, something in your gut was telling you something bad would happen, but you couldn’t get yourself to believe it.
that was until about 10 minutes later, you told your group of girls you would be back to find yeonjun, leaving to the kitchen and searching for him everywhere, even asking his friends you never talked to. you soon spotted a familiar head in the corner of the dining room, that was also filled with many people.
you didn’t want to believe it, you wanted to rub your eyes and make the sight you were seeing blur away, you wanted to cover your ears from the music and shut your eyes just to tell yourself it wasn’t true, but it was. you stood there for a good 3 minutes, tears well falling out of your eyes and down your face already, your shaky hand making its way to cover your mouth that was wide open.
“y-yeonjun..?” you called out as loud as you could, watching the boy turn around after separating his lips from the girl he was cornering, face turning red as soon as he saw your crying figure, you could tell he was horribly drunk but definitely sobered up in some way from the sight of you. “what are you.. doing..?” was the last thing you could murmur out before breaking into tears and turning around, pushing past people to make your way to the front door.
you heard yeonjun shouting your name and telling you to stop and turn around, his voice desperate and almost sweetly convincing. but it was shut out by your mind, your eyes were blurry as tears flowed down your face, everything that entered your ears sounded drowned out, all you could think of was how you needed to get home and just rot in bed.
“y/n, please talk to me! it’s not what it looked like!” he finally said as he got to you, holding your wrist to get you to turn around and face him. after yanking your wrist from his hand, you could see the visible hurt on his face, forcing everything in you to stop yourself from pulling him into your embrace and apologize for “overreacting”.
“don’t start with that bullshit yeonjun! what do you mean its not what it looks like? you wanna sit here and lie to my fucking face and say you weren’t full on making out with that girl? who knows what would even happen if i didn’t catch you, you probably would’ve took her upstairs and fucked her for all i know!” you shouted at him, watching the waterline of his eyes fill with tears of guilt, knowing he messed up bad. you knew yeonjun, and the look he had on his face looked like he just wanted to crouch down and rip all his hair out from guilt, all you could think of is hugging him tightly as if he just had a bad day, but you knew you had to end it here. “you know yeonjun, if you wanna do this shit at parties like you did before we met, you can now. we’re done.” you stated, trying to sound as stern as you could, only to break down after taking a few steps away from the boy.
after walking away, you heard yeonjun break down into tears and sob while watching you walk away, but you knee you had to fight yourself from running back to him and taking him in your arms.
AND HERE WE ARE NOW …
you finally decided to pick up your phone, looking at the time and date, tears welling up once again after seeing it was you and yeonjun’s second anniversary, but it broke you knowing you weren’t together anymore to spend this special day.
unlocking yourself and checking your notifications just broke you more, seeing the messages yeonjun left you after the break up.
my jun ♡
APR 7TH . 8:39 PM
my jun ♡ : hey yn, can we please talk?
my jun ♡ : i know i fucked up
my jun ♡ : just please let me know you’re okay
APR 9TH . 11:46 AM
my jun ♡ : i know you probably don’t wanna see my messages
my jun ♡ : but i can’t stop thinking about you
my jun ♡ : it’s not the same waking up without you
my jun ♡ : i hope you know you’ll always be the one i love with my whole heart
my jun ♡ : i’m so sorry y/n
APR 9TH . 5:34 PM
my jun ♡ : hi y/n, i hope you’ve eaten today
my jun ♡ : i know you have a hard time eating after your classes
my jun ♡ : i’m sorry i can’t be that reminder for you anymore
APR 10TH . 4:26 AM
my jun ♡ : i miss you so much
my jun ♡ : i would do anything to go back and never leave your side at that party again
my jun ♡ : i would do anything to have another chance
my jun ♡ : fuck i’m probably bothering your sleep
my jun ♡ : i’m sorry, i’ll always be sorry. sleep well y/n, 🤍
APR 11TH . 6:38 PM
my jun ♡ : you haven’t been active on any of your social medias
my jun ♡ : are you okay?
my jun ♡ : well i know you aren’t okay
my jun ♡ : i didn’t mean it like that i know you could be okay of course
my jun ♡ : fuck i’m sorry
APR 12TH . 2:17 PM
my jun ♡ : hi y/n
my jun ♡ : i feel a little stalkerish continuing to text you even when you don’t reply, kinda funny isn’t it?
my jun ♡ : what am i kidding, nothings funny to me anymore
my jun ♡ : i can’t even bring myself to talk to anyone anymore
my jun ♡ : i hope you’re doing okay, and not crying anymore
my jun ♡ : you know i hate seeing you cry
my jun ♡ : even tho you look gorgeous when you cry
my jun ♡ : i love you y/n
APR 13TH . 1:07 AM
my jun ♡ : i hope you remember what day it is
my jun ♡ : because i sure do
my jun ♡ : here i am, sitting in my bed alone
my jun ♡ : our song playing on repeat
my jun ♡ : i would do everything and anything just for you to forgive me
my jun ♡ : even just a hug would get me to smile again
my jun ♡ : happy anniversary, i love you forever y/n, even if it’s not the same anymore.
authors note - thank you for reading! i’ve always been bad with angst so this might be total booty cheeks but.. oh well its worth a shot ^-^
PLEASE DO NOT STEAL NOR REPOST !
#౨ৎ antoncyng#౨ৎ antoncyng txt#౨ৎ antoncyng angst#antoncyng#txt#tomorrow x together#yeonjun#choi yeonjun#txt yeonjun#tomorrow x together yeonjun#txt angst#txt x reader#yeonjun x reader#yeonjun angst#yeonjun x you#txt imagines#txt scenarios#txt soobin#txt beomgyu#txt taehyun#txt huening kai#angst
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KALAFINA REUNION 📢IT'S TRUE📢
Why did I even go to bed last night??! Damn it, I lost precious time. Anways, many of you must have seen my post last night about that ominous Nikkan Sports article speculating about a possible comeback of Kalafina. I honestly thought it was fake news since it contained a ton of unconfirmed/uncredited information. However, there was lots of interesting stuff that kept me from dismissing it entirely. I mean, who would go through all the trouble coming up with details such as specific quotes or exact concert details? Turns out they mostly got the dates mixed up but the rest was true. At noon Japanese Standard Time, we got all of our official announcements. Here's the gist of it〈(•ˇ‿ˇ•)-→
Kalafina Staff Posts 1 & 2 on Twitter
Announcement of "Kalafina Anniversary LIVE 2025" Date: Wednesday, January 15, 2025 Open at 17:30 /Start 18:30 Venue: Tokyo Garden Theater Performers: Kalafina (Wakana, Keiko, Hikaru) Music Director: Takebe Satoshi
To everyone who loves and supports Kalafina We have decided to hold a "Kalafina Anniversary LlVE 2025". We want to sing together as a trio again, knowing that you all have always cherished Kalafina, even while we are doing solo activities. We look forward to seeing you there! Kalafina (Wakana, Keiko, Hikaru)
Ticket sales are scheduled for the following dates: ■Wakana/KEIKO Fan Club Advanced Lottery October 10, 2024, 11:00 - October 20, 23:59 ■Hikaru X (formerly Twitter) Advanced Lottery October 25, 11:00 - November 4, 23:59 ■General Ticket Lottery November 9, 11:00 - November 11, 23:59
Keiko Posts 1 & 2 on Twitter & Fan Club Site & Tristone & Instagram post
To all our supporters We have decided to hold a "Kalafina Anniversary LlVE 2025". Through my solo activities and activities with FictionJunction, I have had many new encounters and taken on new challenges, and I am where I am today thanks to the support of many people. This is a personal matter, but the reason I took a break from singing and then decided to sing again was because of Yuki Kajiura's music. And it was the feelings of everyone who has supported us up until now that led to this event. I am grateful for those feelings, and I am simply happy that the three of us can deliver Kalafina's music again. I am truly looking forward to seeing you all next year. KEIKO
Hikaru's Post on Twitter and Instagram
To everyone who always supports us We are happy to announce that we'll be holding a "Kalafina Anniversary LlVE 2025". Even during my solo activities, I always got a strong sense of everyone's love for Kalafina. I'm grateful we are getting this opportunity to sing together again as a trio and to perform all those treasured songs which Yuki Kajiura has written for us. I hope we can raise a new flag together with all of you. I look forward to seeing you there that day! 2024.10.03 Hikaru
Wakana Posts on Twitter & Botanical Land & Instagram post
(We finally have an official statement from Wakana on her Insta) It has been decided that an "Kalafina Anniversary LIVE 2025" will be held on January 15th next year. From 2018 to the present, we have each pursued our own music, but we have decided to sing together again. I would like to express my sincere gratitude to all of you who always think of and love Kalafina. I am very much looking forward to meeting you all.
Satoshi Takebe Tweet 1 & Tweet 2 & Tweet 3 (deleted)
Today I had a meeting with some artists I truly respect and had a beer in the middle of the day 🍺 We had a fun afternoon. I hope there will be lots of fun things to do next year too. I can't say anything yet, but I'm already working on some exciting projects!! (Tweet 1)
I believe that my mission is to support artists. It is never my intention to betray or hurt people. That is the one thing I have always stayed true to, and I will continue to do so. It may sound naive, but I believe that sincerity and passion are what motivate people. (Tweet 2)
Due to confidentiality obligations, I cannot explain the situation. However, Kajiura-san is an artist I respect, she's a wonderful musician, and I am a fan of the music she creates. I would like to support the three members with the utmost respect. (Tweet 3 - deleted)
Tweet by Yuki Kajiura & Tweet 2 & Tweet 3
Regarding Kalafina I've received some inquiries in relation to the most recent announcement of an upcoming Kalafina Live Concert so I'd like to use this opportunity to clarify that I, Yuki Kajiura, will not have no involvement whatsoever in this concert. Furthermore, I have not received any advance notice or explanation from the organisers or any of the group members. Given the situation, I am therefore unable to answer any questions. I apologise, but any future inquiries regarding Kalafina should be directed at the organisers and official agencies of the group members.
I believe the members of Kalafina have decided to step away from me as their producer to go on a new path that is not related to me. I had been searching for a way to work together again in the future to create new Kalafina music but that will no longer be happening. It is very unfortunate but this is the road that each member has chosen. We are all individuals searching for our personal musical path so things like this happen.
As you all know, the three of them are truly wonderful singers so I have no doubt that they will continue to deliver amazing vocals and music to their fans. I would like to express my sincere gratitude once again for the privilege and happiness of having been able to create music together with them for nearly ten years, and I wish Kalafina continued success in the future.
Yuki Kajiura (Tweet 1)
I hope for a great success regarding the upcoming concert, and that's all I can say about this. I hope to continue making music in a cheerful and fun way in the future (^^). (Tweet 2)
This may be an unnecessary remark, but… there's no way that Kalafina will no longer be able to sing their past songs just because one producer has left, and I personally don't wish that upon them.
I'm sure they'll create a wonderful harmony at their live show in January, so I hope you'll give thunderous cheers and applause to Kalafina's singing and to the musicians who support them on stage. Once again, I wish them all the success in the world. (Tweet 3)
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Wow. All of this is wild. I don't even know what to say. I can hardly believe it. On one hand, I am beyond happy and excited. There's no way I will not be there for this concert and everything beyond that. But on the other hand, all the announcements make this feel a little bittersweet. The personal statements by Wakana, Keiko and Hikaru don't necessarily feel disingenuous but they sound a bit flat and forced. Sadly, there's no personal statement from Wakana yet. Obviously, the elephant in the room is Yuki Kajiura's statement and her exclusion from the entire project. The way her statement is written comes off as quite bitter, passive aggressive and honestly a little petty which doesn't bode well for the future (maybe her manager Mori asked her to phrase it in such a way to make the organisers look bad. And I can understand why she would feel frustrated at being excluded like that). Mostly, I interpret her standoffish attitude as a knee-jerk reaction or as a way to strongly distance herself from the whole thing and not so much as an attempt to bash the members (the latter half of the statement would indicate that at least). Also, she already seems to regret posting such a harsh statement and posted a couple of follow-up tweets. I truly do not understand what is going on behind the scenes to cause so much hostility between Yuki Kajiura, her management and whoever is pulling the strings for this Kalafina reunion (presumably Space Craft's management). My best guess is that Space Craft is at least somehow involved in this project since both Wakana and Satoshi Takebe are able to participate (Takebe is not affiliated with Space Craft but he's been in charge of almost all of Wakana's solo work so maybe there are some ties to the agency).It looks like Space Craft are adamant about not working together with YK (same old childish attitude). Then again, Satoshi Takebe has enough influence in the industry to organise a project like this without the help of Space Craft. Maybe Sony is also involved? I have no idea. Hope we are getting more details once the ticket lotteries start. A new Kalafina website (still being developed) has popped up and it's run by Space Craft so that's probably proof enough that they are one of the main players in all of this.
I wonder if this was a spur of the moment thing once they realised how much hype there still exists for Kalafina after that "ring your bell" performance at the FSN event...Overall, the timing is so weird, Why now? I mean, this doesn't sound like it has been in the making for a very long time based on the fact that Yuki Kajiura didn't even know about it. Keiko and Hikaru literally collaborated with her a couple of weeks ago so how did this topic not come up even once???! Wonder how it will affect future collaborations between Yuki, Keiko and Hikaru? They still have the Asia tour dates coming up in November so I can imagine it would be kinda awkward to work together after this bomb has been dropped. Will they still be covering Kalafina songs? Either way, I refuse to believe tha there has been a real falling out between any of them. It comes across like a series of unfortunate events. Maybe some miscommunication and rushed action but nothing that couldn't be cleared up with a proper conversation.
One thing I'm also curious about is whether or not Satoshi Takebe will take on the role as producer for future music (if they are even planning to go down that route?? It does sound like they might have new projects/releases in store for us...I do feel a little conflicted about that since Yuki Kajiura is such an important component of Kalafina. This is basically what I thought would happen back in 2018/2019. With someone else coming in to take charge of the music production. Back then I wasn't completely against the idea since I was convinced the girls could make it work (especially with the help of someone as established and competent as Satoshi Takebe) but it certainly wasn't my preferred option. Ughhh, I will remain open-minded for the time being. My love for Wakana, Keiko and Hikaru goes beyond anything so as of right now, I feel happy and excited. The live in January will be a celebration of Kalafina so there's no way I'm not going. If they continue to hold "tribute" concerts like this, it will mostly be a nostalgic cash-grab but hey, I'm the target group for that. They can have all my money. And I can definitely see myself supporting them in future projects even with Yuki Kajiura out of the picture. Takebe has been engaging in some surprisingly frank one-on-one discussions on Twitter and so far, it looks like certain confidentiality agreements keep him from going into detail in the matter but his involvement as of right now is limited to being a director/producer for the concert on January 15.
It goes without saying that I will not tolerate any hate towards the girls on this blog! If you are bitter that Yuki Kajiura is not involved, that's your prerogative, I'm sure this will antagonise quite a few hardcore YK fans. But please, don't shit on the members for making this decision. I'm sure they put a lot of thought into it and felt like this course of action was in everyone's best interest. They are clearly thinking about the fans, their own passion/love for Kalafina's music and obviously their careers within the industry.
#kalafina#news#Kalafina Anniversary LIVE 2025#wakana#keiko#hikaru#yuki kajiura#kajiura yuki#space craft#speculation#need to ignore all the negative comments everywhere#kalafina reunion
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